Innocence Lost (Negan x OC)

late night commissary

For the rest of the day, I sat in my room and thought about what took place. I kissed the enemy twice. Twice. What was wrong with me? Was I ill? Maybe I was just really lonely.

I hated myself if I was being honest. Almost two months had gone by since Glenn and Abraham were killed and I was kissing the man who murdered them. The only thing I could say to defend myself is that it was my way of coping.

In this world, grief is everywhere. I was just trying to deal with it, right? I could tell myself that over and over but it never made me feel better. All I could think of was Rick. If he knew, he would literally cut my head off. With Michonne's help.

After Fletcher left, I sat on my bed for about 4 hours in thought. I thought about getting a journal to keep all this in, but with my shitty luck, someone would surely find it.

I checked my digital alarm clock and it was 7:56. Fletcher would be here soon with dinner. I liked him a lot. He made me smile, laugh, blush, and any positive emotion I could think of. But I just didn't see us being together. I just could not see it. Why? I had no idea. But could I see myself with Negan? Also no.

Things with him were different. He intimidated me, made me weak, and killed people who I was close with. But he also made me stir with his gaze, made me weak at the knees, made my body feel like it was on fire, and made me feel important. He was just such an asshole. I put my hands on my face and groaned.

After tonight, I was going to stay as far away from relationships as I could. No more of this. I needed to focus on more important things. Rick had to have some sort of plan to get me out. I was hoping he hadn't forgot about me. But did I want to leave? I slapped myself internally. Of course I did. I wanted to be back with my family. I had to be back with them. I couldn't play for the wrong side.

A soft knock on my door alerted me and I looked to the clock. It was 8 and that could only mean it was Fletcher.

"Who is it?" I said, grinning. I stood up and looked at the door, crossing my arms. I hear shuffling on the other side and I laughed quietly.

"House keeping." I heard a mock woman's voice say. I laughed again and walked to the door, turning the knob. Fletcher stood outside my door with two trays of food in his hands. He wore a playful grin.

A maroon plaid shirt was covering his torso and he wore dark jeans with sneakers. He looked cute. I shook the thoughts of his appearance from my head and moved to the side of the door, letting him through. He sauntered in, setting the trays on my desk. He sat down on the love seat and blew out a puff of air.

"You're late you're late, for a very important date." I fake scolded, flicking my gaze to the clock on my bedside table. He rolled his eyes.

"It's 8:01, sue me." He rose his hands in defense and I rolled my brown eyes back. He chuckled quietly and tapped his hands on his thighs. It was silent for a couple minutes, the only sound being our light breathing and the occasional Savior walking by my door. I walked over to the trays and before I could grab my plate, he slapped my hand away. My mouth dropped open and I looked at him. He was grinning.

"You do not touch this food until you tell me about that necklace." Oh god. I was praying he forgot. I huffed and crossed my arms, staring into his eyes. He stared back, challenging me. I knew he wasn't going to give in. I just knew it. I groaned and walked to my bed and plopped onto my back dramatically.

"Fine." I said after a while. He sat up in his seat and smiled excitedly.

I sighed. "Before Negan took me from my group, I was with them for quite a long time. I found them about 6 months after everything happened. Rick, the leader, found me near death and saved me after my parents died. He took me in like his own child. We have all been through so much together. About a year ago, I had calculated my birthday. I wasn't intending on anyone finding out but Rick's son Carl did eventually. He told Rick and I guess they got this for me. It's super important because it holds an extremely valuable picture," I clicked it open and he got up from his seat and walked over, taking the locket in his hands and examining the small picture, "They are my family, Fletch. They always will be. I miss them so much. All of them." I said, adding emphasis on all. I was referring to the ones we lost. A couple tears escaped my eyes and I wiped them fast. He breathed out and rubbed the back of his neck.