friend in need

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The next day went by slowly.

I tried to keep myself busy. If I wasn't, I'd think about it. I couldn't think about it anymore. At least not until I told Rick. But no matter how hard I tried to push it into the back of my mind, it kept reappearing with a vengeance.

'You're carrying Negan's baby.'

My conscience continued to bug me. I would always fight her off by thinking of ways to improve Alexandria as we rebuilt. It helped to talk to people. However, the longer I talked to them, the closer I would get to telling them about it.

The spring air rustled the leaves of the tree above my head and I looked up, taking in the sight of various greens. The constant sound of drills and hammers bounced off the walls of the small community as things were constructed. The sounds were annoying at first but like walker groans, you got use to it.

The bench below me was starting to get uncomfortable as I looked back down to the thin piece of paper in my hands. I picked up the pencil I had discarded from my hand during my brief distraction and started to sketch the blueprints for gardens. During this past month I had read up on growing and gardening and Rick left it up to me to make a plan. I didn't want to fail him. Not again.

As the led made more and more lines appear, my mind kept running off to that one thing. And I feared it wouldn't go away until I told someone.

I tossed my pencil back onto the wood and put my head in my hands, sighing. My fingers tugged at the roots of my hair in frustration. I couldn't escape my own mind.

My eyes scanned the community again, trying to distract myself for what seemed like the 100th time. It was consuming me. My eyes darted from house to house, building to building, even tree to tree.

I had to tell someone. There had to be someone to confide in.

It was as if the universe read my mind as I saw the familiar face walking down the street. Lucas.

He walked casually, fitting in and not fitting in at the same time. It was hard for him still. Especially since he use to be a Savior. Everyone treated him like an outcast despite the war being over. I had felt bad. I was so distracted lately that I didn't have time to spend with him or even talk to him. He was probably struggling to settle in.

I watched him jog up the stairs to his shared house with Aaron and slip through the door.

I moved before thinking as I stood up and started towards the house. Alexandrians waved to me as I walked by which I returned kindly with a smile. I felt like I was on auto-pilot because I cannot for the life of me figure out how I managed to smile so much. I was knee deep in stress.

My knuckles connected with the wooden door gently, alerting Lucas that I was here. I stepped back and held my hands behind my back, my eyes scanning the porch. A couple potted plants made me smile as I waited for the door to open.

"Coming!" Lucas shouted, his voice muffled by the door. I missed his voice. My ears perked up at the sound of his footsteps getting closer and closer until the door handle twisted and he stepped out. Surprise overtook his features. He probably thought I forgot him.

"Carli. Wow, hi. It's-" He started but I interrupted.

"Been a while. I know." I said sheepishly. He sighed, a small smile returning to his lips.

Before I could say anything he embraced me warmly. I stood like a idiot at first, shocked. I figured he would've been angry at me for practically forgetting about him. I did that to people a lot. My stunned arms at my sides finally came to life as I wrapped them around him and squeezed. I missed him so much. While we were at the Sanctuary, we became rather close. After Negan's downfall, he was there for me for a couple of days before we were separated.

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