Semester at Seas BxB (Staten Krown)

15

The words in my heart had reached him. I knew it. I saw the impact as they hit him and embraced him. They cradled his heart.

He was far away now...turned away now...but I wondered if those word still held him.

I felt defeated as I walked off the stage after emptying my heart to a man who just turned back. I saw the eyes of Vince first. They seemed to be judging this entire show. He was biting at his lip so hard that I felt like he was trying to rip it off.

Then I saw Patience. As I crossed her, I stopped. I knew she was going to say something and I expected it. I wanted to hear what she had to say.

"It's only beginning," she said, "Amir's gone. Tell your other new friends they'd better watch there back too."

Her threat was clear and I didn't reply. There was no need. Patience knew exactly what she was doing and arguing with her would only make it worse.

I'd been embarrassed. I'd been embarrassed beyond anything. I felt like everyone would give a response like Desmond. I'd made it clear that it was Amir and I to the entire school. I let them all know I was gay.

No longer a speculation...no longer a rumor.

I had done it for him and he'd left me.

I locked myself in his room, just like I'd done since we broke up. It was always the easiest way to deal with things. It was so easy to hide myself in the sheets. The sheets were losing his smell. They were losing everything about Amir.

It was becoming my room now.

There were knocks on the door.

More knocks.

The embarrassment was really settling in as I played the scene back in my head. I didn't have to go all out like that at the dinner. I didn't have to sing to him. I mean, my voice was complementing but the song I sang was pointless. Everything about this whole heartbreaking situation was pointless.

Why couldn't I just move on?

There were even harder bangs on the door.

I finally got up off the bed and scurried my way to the door to see Pony, Jr., Desmond and Kim. They broke into the door without asking permission and scattered around the room. Jr. shut the door behind him.

Kim had tears in her eyes.

"Ok...ok, I hear you," she told me, "I hear you now. It was emotional up there. You really touched me. That is real love."

"What's going on?" I asked, "Why are you guys here?"

They all had a serious look on their face as though everyone had found out someone had just died. Jr. had to have the most serious among them, but it was Kim who had tears in her eyes that really concerned me.

"We came to help get you two back," Pony explained.

I was lost, "Huh?"

Jr. took over, speaking to me in a way I'd better understand, "We have to get you and Amir back together. We all realize now that you two are meant to be together. We came to help."

"He's right...Amir isn't happy with Felicia. We all see it. It is killing him. This is for him too," Pony replied.

"I tried..." I cry, "Damn...I tried all I could. He doesn't even want to see me. What can you guys do?"

"Exactly," Desmond added, "I thought I was the only one here with a straight mind. Patience doesn't want Amir and her brother to be together. Amir is taking him away from her. She won't allow them to be together."