Fandom One-Shots

suffering {avengers} (c)

if the title doesn't give it away.... angst. pure angst.

he knew what stark felt now, the crushing guilt of all those souls on his conscious.

it was ironic, he thought, that he was considered so pure and righteous when he had brought so much death and darkness upon the people he loved.

he didn't deserve it. he wasn't worthy, in a way.

but tony was. he had always been worthy.

maybe that was why steve couldn't understand why the universe constantly threw shit at him, trying to drag him down to hell.

it was like god decided that tony would get all the bad karma for his deeds, regardless if they were good or not.

it was why steve understood why you were taken from him.

"i'm sorry."

it made sense, in his self-loathing head. but it didn't make it right.

despite the guilt pouring over him, steve was a selfish man and could only blame himself for so long before he started to complain and ask "why you?" you were a child in steve's eyes, a person who had yet to see who they would become and what they would do.

someone steve couldn't wait to see grow and evolve, to become the person he knew you could be.

it was the final straw.

"help me, steve, please!"

taking you away from him made him see just how strong tony was to continue living.

it had been minutes and already he wanted to switch places with you.

better him then you; you had more to live for. steve had done his time- it was someone else's turn to step up to the plate and take charge.

he and tony deserved a break from all their pain.

he hoped that wherever you were sent, you weren't alone. he knew how you hated it.

it reminded you of home, a place that was anything but.

and he couldn't protect you anymore. you were truly on your own. steve knew you could protect yourself, but... you shouldn't have to. if he had just done his goddamn job, you wouldn't be gone right now and he wouldn't have to explain to peter why you weren't coming back. he wouldn't have to break that kid's heart because you would have been here, full of life, smiling hugely at him. you would've taken one look at tony and forgiven him for everything, even though steve could now see that it wasn't entirely his fault.

you would have been here to comfort him, to show him that despite every mistake he had made, steve did one thing right.

"steve? i'm sorry... i wasn't strong enough..."

he stared at the corpse blankly, unseeing and refusing to believe. nothing else mattered except killing the man who had done this. nothing was more important than revenge. his fists curled at his sides. thanos would pay, and tony stark agreed wholeheartedly.

"mr. stark, i don't feel so good..."

death followed him, an invisible trail of bodies leading to this very spot.

everyone he loved died. he was a plague to any who dared get close to him.

it happened with his mother, it almost happened with rhodey and pepper, and now it had happened with peter.

if only he had been stronger.

it was because he was too weak, too incapable to stop the inevitable.