My smile is extinct🥀

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Hi, so this is angst and I do have warnings for triggers for blood, suicide and self-harm. Just a heads up. I'm sorry guys I really am...the reason I wrote this is because my crush who also happens to be my best friend found a girlfriend and she doesn't even talk to me anymore because of it...yes it's kinda based off the song, if you haven't heard it you should give it a listen, it's pretty good. I'm sorry if you don't like it. I'm sorry.
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Keith laid in bed, it was around 6 or so and his mother walked up to his room and notified him about dinner being done. Keith nodded and looked at his phone. "I guess no one cares that I skipped school for a week, well...I'm not that important anyway.." Keith thought as he leaned up and walked downstairs to dinner. He sat down and thanked his mom for cooking. "Keith you got a basket or something from school, i don't know who sent it or dropped it off." Krolia said as she ate a piece of broccoli. Keith looked up at her with a mouth full of food. He chewed and swallowed than wiped his mouth. "Where is it?" Keith asked in surprise as he got up. "Uh no sir, not until you finish your dinner." Krolia said as she looked at Keith with a playful smile. Keith finished his supper and cleaned the plates. "Now where is it?" Keith asked Krolia got up and grabbed the basket from the top of the fridge. Keith grabbed it from her hands and walked to the table with it and sat it down. Keith opened and first found a letter.

"Hey, Keith I hope that your okay and I miss joking around with you at school okay butthole. So stop being sick or whatever just come back. Oh and you won't believe what happened, Shiro and Adam were saw f*cking in the library. Can you believe that?!  But they said that Shiro had a this look it was like a mixture of sadness but yet anger. They also saw Shiro and Adam arguing I mean like close to a fist fight arguing, I guess they had like anger sex to apologize in a way? I don't know man all I know is that you need to get back to school like ASAP."
~~~Pidge

Keith felt his chest tighten and he started shaking. "Keith honey what's wrong? Your smiled disappeared." Krolia said as she placed her hand on Keiths shoulder. Keith gulped down tears and smiled at Krolia. "N-nothing I'm going to bed, goodnight mother." Keith said as he grabbed the basket and the note and took it to his room. Keith closed the door and locked it behind him and slid down the door. He felt hot tears stream down his cheek. "Why am I even upset? Because the guy I've loved ever since elementary,the guy that made me realize I was gay.  The f*cking guy that protected me when I was being bullied, f*cked someone that wasn't me. He probably doesn't even know I exist anymore. I wanted him to be my first, I tried for years to get him to myself, to have him in bed f*cking me into mattress making me moan and scream for more but instead he falls for Adam. Adam is hotter Adam is smarter, Adam I guess is everything that Shiro wants. I'm not thin enough maybe, I'm not pretty or handsome enough I-i can change just for him I can cut my hair I can lose more weight..even though I'm already extremely underweight. God I'm stupid for falling in love." Keith thought as he got up and looked more into the basket "Aw she got me my favorite cologne and the t-shirt I've always wanted!" Keith chirped out as he held up the t-shirt.

"Keith get down here please!" Krolia said. Keith went downstairs and sat down on the couch. "What's up?" Keith asked, "you need to go get a shower, your going back tomorrow, they said that they fixed everything with the mold in all of the classrooms so you can go back without having a allergic reaction." Krolia said as she smiled. Keith gave a smile "yay so I can finally go hangout and pick on pidge." Keith said "I'm going to get a shower and go to bed early, goodnight mother." Keith said softly "goodnight Keith" krolia said. Keith got a shower and went to bed.

Next day~~~

Keith got up and got dressed and went to school. When Keith got there Pidge came running up and tackling him in a hug. "My god your finally back!" Pidge yelled. Keith smiled and put his phone and headphones in his locker and he walked to his first period with pidge. The teacher gasped and smiled as she patted Keith's shoulder. "Well welcome back Mr. kogane, we've missed you." The teacher said Keith smiled and took his seat. Class with 15 minutes in "alright class I am assigning a group project on all the minerals of the earth. Yes I know that there are a lot but considering that there are only 6 of y'all in all of the 11th grade there will be two groups of three ok, so I want Pidge Keith and shiro in one group and Matt,Adam and lance in the other. "WHAT?!!" Keith and Pidge yelled. "Is there a problem? You could just take on everyone's project for yourself and they all get an A and you don't. Do you want me to do that?" The teacher asked with a sassy attitude "n-no m'am were good." Pidge said "alright then your groups have been assigned and you have your project to work on, this should be turned in next Friday, no later than that, alright get in your groups and begin y'all already know what to do." The teacher said as she sat down and started grading papers while the class worked.

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