Promise Me

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I do have a crush on (Y/n).  

My eyes widen and I try to steady my racing heartbeat. I start to breath a little more rigidly, feeling like all the air was squeezed out of me.

Oh no.

"Peter? Are you okay?"

I look up to see (Y/n)'s face scrunched up in concern.

"I-I'm fine..." I whisper.

I can't have a crush on my best friend!

That's crazy!

It'll ruin everything!

And there's no way she could possibly like me back.

"What's up loser?" MJ greets as she sits down beside (Y/n). "Hey (Y/n)."

"Hey MJ..." (Y/n) trails off as she sneaks another worried glance towards me.

"Hey Peter, are you feeling okay?" Ned asks as he sits down beside me.

My eyes snap up to Michelle. "Can I talk to you please?" I croak out.

She raises an eyebrow at me in suspicion. "Sure?" 

We stand up and head over to the corner of the room, Ned and (Y/n) casting suspicious glances at us as we did.

Once we're out of earshot, I turn to MJ. "You're right. I do like (Y/n)."

MJ's eyes light up. "I knew it!"

"But," I continue, "I can't do anything about it."

Her smile drops. "Why not?"

"Because! MJ, she's my best friend! If I did anything...it-it would ruin everything! I don't want anything to change!" I make wild hand gestures to get my point across.

MJ rolls her eyes. "But what if it changes for the better?"

"What if it doesn't? I'm not taking that chance."

Michelle narrows her eyes. "And what if she likes you back?"

My heart skips a beat. "Sh-she said she likes me?"

"No." She states bluntly, "but honestly, you guys are made for each other. It took you a long time to realize how you felt. Give her time."

"MJ," I shake my head. "No, Michelle, it'll ruin everything."

She narrows her eyes even more. "Do you really think that's fair?"

I look up at her questioningly. "What?"

"Do you really think it's fair, to you or to her, to deprive both of yourselves of something that could be so wonderful? You could make each other so happy! I believe that there's only one person out there for all of us. Do you really think it's fair to take away something so special, just because you're too afraid of the unknown? Because you're too afraid to leave your comfort zone? Because you're too scared to act?"

Her words take me by surprise, making me hesitate, but I shake it out of my head. "What I have with (Y/n) right now is great. She's my best friend and I am happy. I don't want to lose that happiness just because I couldn't be satisfied by what I have. I'm not losing what I have."

"Who says you have to lose anything?"

"MJ--"

"Have you ever heard the quote, 'you can never sail the ocean if you're too scared to lose sight of the shore'?"

I turn to face her one last time. "Michelle, I'm asking you as a friend, please, please, just drop it. And I'm begging you, do not tell (Y/n). Promise me."

"Peter--"

"Promise me."

She remains silent for a minute, before finally answering. "Fine. I promise I won't tell (Y/n), but I still think you should."

He lock eyes for another minute before finally heading back to the lunch table.

When we reach the table, we find another figure sitting there as well.

In my spot.

Harrison.

I feel my hand clench into a fist, and MJ place a hand on my shoulder. The act of attempted reassurance is odd, since she usually doesn't do these sorts of things, but this time I find it oddly calming. Kind of.

"There you guys are!" (Y/n) exclaims once she notices our presence. "What were you two talking about that took so long? Lunch is practically over!"

I look over at MJ, mentally reminding her of the promise she made.

Michelle sighs. "Nothing. Don't worry about it."

(Y/n) eyes us suspiciously, but drops the subject. "Whatever. Peter, if we want to make it to Science on time, we better leave now. I got you a granola bar--" she tosses the bar at me which I catch-- "Since you won' t have time to finish your lunch."

I smile gratefully at her. "Thank you."

"No problem." She stands up and links arms with me, pulling me to her side. "We better go then. See you later guys."

I wave to the rest of them, no longer too bothered by Harrison's presence, since (Y/n) currently seems to rather be with me.

We walk in silence to our science class, our arms still linked together, which I am all too aware of.

I feel her body heat against my side, as I feel the colour rush to my cheeks. I clear my throat and turn away.

"Is everything okay, Peter?" I turn to see her looking up at me.

Our faces are pretty close...

Stop!

"Yeah. Everything's fine."

"What was that whole conversation you and MJ had about?" She asks. "It looked pretty serious."

I shake my head and smile. "Nothing. Don't worry about it."

She looks at me, still skeptical. "...Alright."

Still, I feel her arm tighten around mine.

"Hey, Peter?" She asks again. "Can you promise me something?"

I look down at her, a little concerned. "Sure?"

"Can you promise me that if something bad was about to happen, you'd let me know about it?" Her eyes look guarded, and uncertain. A little scared even.

What does she think is gonna happen?

"Of course," I answer. "Is anything wrong?"

"...No...it's just like--do you ever get these weird feelings, like everything is completely normal, but all of a sudden you feel upset and needy?"

I think of all those times, that I realize now, I was feeling jealous of Harrison.

But (Y/n) can't be jealous.

Right?

What would she even be jealous of?

"Occasionally, but I try to just ignore them," I say as we arrive at the classroom door.

"Okay. Thanks, Peter." She nods to herself and releases my arm, walking into the class with me behind her.

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