Spencer Reid | One Shots

happier

Things hadn't been good recently.

It seems that they'd done more fighting with each other than loving each other.

Spencer traveled a lot, leaving his girlfriend of over a year at home in their apartment.

The apartment that feels so lonely and empty without him in it. And he's hardly there.

Y/N has a hard time when he's gone. She loves him. She loves him so much.

But she can't handle being without him... and he's always gone.

She hates missing him. She hates staying in their bed alone. She hates the silence.

She hates how when he's home... they fight. Not even about something worth fighting about. But about her missing him. About how she gets lonely. How she hates being by herself in the shell of an apartment that's cold, dark, and lifeless without him to brighten it up.

It always ended the same way. With her crying, and him putting on a brave face while it eats at him inside.

"It's my job, Y/N! What do you want me to do?"

Those words ran through their heads after he said them. When they laid down to go to sleep, backs to each other... it played over and over again in their minds.

He couldn't believe he'd said it. He hadn't meant for it to come out like that. He hadn't meant to make it seem like his job was more important than her. She's the most important thing in his life. She's really all that he's got. She's the only thing that sheds light in the darkness that surrounds him.

She shook a little bit as she cried in the bed next to him. She did her best to stay quiet, not wanting the boy to try to comfort her. She can't believe that he said that. She can't believe that his job means more to him than her. She wasn't in any way asking him to quit. She was just expressing her feelings.

The next morning, he left for work early after a text about a case in Texas. He woke her up, running his hand through her hair.

When her eyes opened, he gave her a small, apologetic smile.

"It's early..." She gave him a sad look. "You're leaving?"

He nodded and apologized to her. "I have to..."

"You just got back," Y/N frowns, sitting up in the bed and looking at him. Her eyes are pleading for him to stay, but she already knows that work is more important.

"I know. I'm sorry, but-"

"It's your job..." She finishes for him. "I know. I'm sorry,"

He wonders why she's the one apologizing. He's the one leaving. Again.

Spencer shakes his head and leans over to give her a kiss goodbye. Their lips meet, but the kiss is melancholy.

When he pulls away, he caresses her cheek with his hand and she nuzzles up to it. The both of them exchange sad looks.

"I love you," He tells her.

"I love you," She tells him.

He stands back up, looking down at her. "I'll call you when I land in Texas,"

She nods and bids him farewell before walking him out as she usually does.

When the door closes between them, a feeling of dread passes over Y/N. She backs up against the door and sinks to the floor, tears running down her cheeks.

Spencer walks down the stairs, feeling guilty. He didn't want to leave her again. He really didn't. He wants to turn around and go back up the stairs. To kiss her and tell her how much he loves her and call out for a little bit. Sit this case out. But he doesn't.