Holy Crap I'm Sasuke!

new teacher

My eyes snapped open. Power unlike anything I'd ever experienced was surging through me.

The chakra coming from me was so dense that it nearly lifted me up to my feet on it's own, I felt bloody AWESOME.

I cut my eyes to my surroundings, and immediately groaned. I was under that tree, with an unconscious Naruto and Sakura outside fighting for her life against sound ninja... but that wasnt the worst of it, no... the absolute worst thing was I now had an anger hickie from that pedophile looking asshole.

Great, just how every man(boy?) wants to wake up... I want a fucking shower.

Where was I?

"Sound Canon!" I moved, everything around me traveling in slow motion thanks to my forced open sharingan and the power boost.

I grabbed Naruto and bolted outside to see a wave of powerful wind chakra about to hit Sakura. She had her arms crossed in front of her and was trying to stop the blast from hitting us... that's... Infinitely more useful than she was originally.

I dropped Naruto and double timed back to her and yanked her away, just as the blast soared by and destroyed our little tree/root thing.

"Take a break, Sakura." I said, bloodtrickled from her forehead and she was crying, but she was okay.

"Hey Uchiha, we were sent to kill you, what do you think about that?" I turned my head and saw the three sound genin standing in formation. Only the asshole with bandages seemed to realise the shit was about to hit the fan.

I grinned, the mark was responding the my excitement over the idea of fighting.

The guy with a haircut similar to Kakashi's aimed his palms at us. "Clocks ticking Uchiha."

"I'm more or less just impressed you're still holding your hands up."

"Wha-," SCHLIIICHK! I crossed the distance between us and sliced his arms off at the elbow, then hurled a kunai into the bandaged genin's throat, it took about the same amount of time its take you to blink.

Zaku screamed in pain as his arms fell to the ground limply.

I laughed loudly, "This is fucking amazing. I've never felt so powerful... so fucking deadly." With a flick of my katana I separated Zaku's head from his shoulders and then flicked the blood to the ground.

The female sound member fell to her knees in shock so I turned slowly and leveled my katana at her face, "Now, I cant forget you, can I? You three hurt my friend over there. How bout I-" arms grabbed me around the waist so I flipped the sword in my hand and started to stab behind me but I caught sight of pink hair.

"P-please.... stop Sasuke... you're better than this..." I paused. Am I better than brutally executing a girl after murdering her friends in cold blood? Fuck, I think I might be... if only a bit. I looked down at my hand, black ink like marks covered my hand, so I cursed. The mark took away some of my inhibitions, and I didnt even notice. Well fuck that, I'm not going to be some lunatic on a leash.

The power receded into the mark and I stumbled, suddenly feeling like I'd run a marathon with Choji on my back.

I shook my head. "Thanks Sakura... I'm good now." I looked over to the sound girl, "The hell are you still here for? Your teammates got made into diced vegetables, you're out numbered, out gunned, and in hostile territory, get the fuck outta here Sparkle Titts."

I put a hand up to my head, it was pounding and every sound made it worse, "And now my sugar high is leaving me with a headache... fucking Canada..."

I looked down at the bandaged genin and saw the scroll we needed so I grabbed it. Then i looked at Sakura, "Hey, did a dude in a green jump suit try to help you?"

She nodded, "Yeah, a couple of genin came and got him when you woke up."

They didnt stay? Little deviations are so weird. "Let's grab Naru and head to the tower. No use putting the shit off."

An hour later we'd made it to the tower, without getting attacked by the weird clone genjutsu guys. Good, I was starting to smell like a used tampon...because of the blood, not because I'm a pussy... fuck you I'm sleepy, I feel violated because of Pedochimaru, and I sincerely need a shower.

I sat down and leaned against the railing, ready to pass out when a guy stood next to me.

I climbed to my feet quickly, note to self, when a dude stands with his junk eye level to you in fucking spandex, you see a fair amount of moose knuckle.

"Well, I'm awake now, what's up, Lee?" I asked the bowl cut boy wonder.

He smiled and gave me a thumbs up, "I sm well this youthful morning, thank you Uchiha-san!"

"Yeah, right... hey we're both Konoha genin, we should stick together... help each other out, right?" I asked.

He nodded quickly, "Are you asking for taijutsu lessons? I'd be more than happy to-,"

"Yeah, not quite. We'll save that box for Pandora. No, I've got a secret weapon, meant for someone that cant use ninjutsu or genjutsu." I told him, knowing his back story.

Tears flooded his eyes, "Truly, Sasuke-san?"

"Just Sasuke is fine, and yes. Here." I held out my tag I'd had made for him, mentally holding my poker face.

He took it gratefully, "Thank you very much! How do I use it?"

"Just put it on any surface, and wait. It will nonlethally(maybe) take out your opponent. Trust me." I stuck it in his hand and he put it in his pouch.

"I have nothing to give you, Sasuke, I am sorry..." he replied.

I waved him off, "Forget it, I'm going to watch your fight with my sharingan, use what I learn from you to become stronger, if that's alright?" Yeah I'd do it no matter what he said but he nodded gratefully.

"I'm honored to know I can help you in your youthful endeavors!"

First fight... Garra vs Rock Lee.

I grinned, this was going to be hilarious.

The fight started similarly to canon when about a minute or two into it, Rock Lee landed a blow.

Garra doubled over, blood dripped from his face. "What is this feeling?" His voice got darker, almost demonic, and he looked up, "This is my blood.... I've never seen my blood... Mother will-," at the word 'Mother' there was a shockwave from the middle of the floor that sent thousands of gallons of water in all directions.

Lee jumped high, avoiding it, and landed on the now twenty feet of water inside the building. Just a couple feet below the other genin.

Lee turned a shocked Expression towards me so I gave him a thumbs up.

Garra finally came out of the water without his gourd or any sand.

"Impossible! That kid used the water to make the sand too heavy for Garra to use, he's defenseless!" Kankuro exclaimed, gripping the railing in shock.

Well, I was actually hoping he didnt know how to water walk or swim since he was from the desert, but this is fun too.

Lee then beat Garra into unconsciousness with little effort.

"Well, that was fun. Wonder who's next?"

Next time on dragon ball z... Sasuke vs Kiba... wait this isnt dragonball? Fuck.