❝ You always save everyone else, but who saves you? ❞
❝ No one, because I can save myself. ❞
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! UNDER HEAVY EDITING !
{ Captain America : The First Avenger }
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Allie shuffles along, not bothering to get out of people's way as she walks towards the training area of the base. She bangs shoulders with any soldier that she passes who don't move out of her way, and instead of offering them an apology, she just keeps on walking. Her gaze is firmly planted on her feet in an attempt to hide the despair that sits in her darkened brown eyes.
She has been cloaked in this depressed like state ever since she was told last week that she couldn't have children of her own.
She tried to avoid everyone like the plague. She didn't want people to see her like this, to see her as a shell of the person that she had been only just a couple of days before. She didn't want them to see that anything was wrong.
To see how utterly destroyed she was.
Being a mother had never crossed her mind before and she never thought that she could even have a family of her own. She never had the opportunity to be with someone and have a family. To be free and happy.
But now that she has, she finds out that her now attainable dream is actually unattainable.
And even though the sun streams down around her and there isn't a cloud in sight, she feels that her entire world has been turned from its usual brightness to a dull grey. Nothing seems appealing and there is little beauty around her to marvel at.
Her mood has ricocheted from low to lower as she stares at all the happy faces around her. She was even surprised at how she came up with the energy to get out of bed this morning and drag herself to work. And now that she is making her way there, she feels the slightest bit of motivation that she had managed to come up with, dissipate into thin air.
She quickly swipes under her eyes as she walks, making sure that there are no remnants of her tears left. She doesn't want anyone to see the pain that she is going through. This isn't like any other time that she has been upset because there is no way possible that they could help her through it.
They can't bring back her ability to have kids.
And as she nears the training area where she and Peggy are going to be training the recruits, Allie almost freezes midstep as she gazes at an all too familiar line of soldiers. Her sight is quickly replaced by a memory from her past that makes the entire world fade away for a few moments.
Her mind takes her back to when she was made to train with the men at HYDRA when she was in her later years of training. She would stare at the men all in a singular line dressed in the black HYDRA attire before she was made to take them all on by herself. And if she didn't defeat them, they would defeat her.
