Night Fall || PJM

s i x

"I-I killed them...."

Jin's eyes squinted at first, not believing the fact escaping my mouth. Seeing my expression as serious as anyone could imagine, he slowly rose up from his seat.

By his reaction, I could sense that he was having a hard time believing in me. 

Silence consumed the air around us. Even the tears leaving my eyes were silent. Jin said nothing adding to the stillness present in the atmosphere.

I wanted to pour out each and every detail of the incident which took place. For which I kept blaming, cursing and hating myself. But as if letters lost their ability to form words, not even a single sound left my throat.

The ticking of the huge and clock in the hall became more and more prominent. Never did I realise the loudness of its feeble pitch.

Each moment passing away dripped with agony. I felt lost, afraid.

Lost enough to resemble myself with one of the pebbles sinking into the river. Afraid enough to be doubting my ability to live again. All of it just because of one sentence. Just because of my parents.

Jin came towards my side, holding me tightly. His hands promising to never let go as our fingers intertwined.

That comforting act of his was enough for my vulnerability to melt right then and there. I bent myself down into the crook of his neck attempting to hide myself from the world.

His cologne resembled the freshness and lightness of mildew. Hands wrapped tightly around my figure filled with a sense of comfort.

As soon as my gaze went to Jin's, the only statement arising in my head was I don't deserve him.

"Shush.." He patted my shoulder softly. His eyes looked curious and somewhat confused. His pats were not eager to know. Instead, they felt gentle and soft.

It encouraged me to speak. Expose myself to bits. He was the only one I could trust in the moment.

"Jin, do you remember the day I left the orphanage with a high-class couple ?"

His eyebrows narrowed down to the depths of his foreheads trying to recall the long lost memory. After a considerable amount of time and thinking, his eyes lit in recognition.

"Oh they came in a Royal Royce and had a little boy right ?" I nodded subtly while remembering his appearance myself. He was so sweet and beautiful with red cheeks accompanying his bright eyes.

"What about 'em ?"

"So I was adopted by the rich business couple, living around the outskirts of Busan."

I still remember the day I left. Jin's eyes mistly pleaded for me to not let go. Giving each other the promise of meeting again wasn't enough as it never came true. Until now that is.

"The house was so much bigger than our orphanage. They loved me so much. I got to experience everything a family is cherished for. A feeling so foreign but it didn't last forever" He hummed in response quietly.

"Everything was well for a couple of years or simply I was just too young to realise. Something happened between mum and dad, they'd never let their children experience their fueds but it soon changed as the arguments increased in number."

"Then suddenly I don't know, when I was about 16, my dad's company bankrupted. He was also charged for bribes or drugs or something." I never knew about all the details. I never asked either. But the peace of house was surely going up in flames after the company shut down.

"He became more and more aggressive. What he needed that time was love, care. Someone to tell him that everything was gonna be alright. Somebody to hug him and let his tears fall down. He needed my mum. But I guess she loved dad for his money."

All the fights which took place between often included violence. I heard the shouts of rage filled with hatred for each other while lying down in my bed. Too much for my heart to bear it was.

"He became abusive, restless. That was when he came to know about mom's affair. It broke him honestly. The woman he loved was not his after all." He used to be so strong with a sense of pride but since that day, everything changed.

"But the worst part of all, he blamed me for it. For everything stupid happening around us. As if I was a curse laid down upon their family." I scoffed harshly as the memories of my own brother leaving my side forever since came to mind. 

Jin's eyes became glossier by the second, his grip tightening on my fragile conscious.

"Then the day came, a day before my 17th birthday. 29th October 2019. The day he kicked me out from our home. As if it was my fault to be adopted by them." Sighing, I continued towards the even worse part of the story. 

A slight hesitation was what I felt before muttering the sentence, as if afraid I again was to be suspected. Even by him.

 "And a week later, all three of them were murdered." Those silents tears became much more audible as I burst out in his chest. "An-And everyone everywhere, be it my school, the neighbours and my own friends claimed the murderer to be myself."  

"There was no proof found at the place, but my dad-"I sniffled a bit. "My stepfather, well he had many enemies." 

"Shortly after, my whole locker was bombarded with threats, getting beaten up during the lunch and after school became my daily routine. So I dropped out, moving away from the fake city of lights and laughter." 

Silence was what followed there after. Tears couldn't stop flowing neither his grip loosened in any way. 

"Calm down." His breathy voice commanded as I obeyed him sniffling.

"Whatever happened, happened. It wasn't your fault and I believe in you." He immediately sealed my mouth, not wanting to know any further details while averting his gaze away.

He forced my head on his shoulders wrapping my small figure in his embrace. Soon enough the tears soaked up in the atmosphere and I went into a deep slumber.

JIN'S POV

Oh Y/N, You poor little clueless bitch.

It's been 13 months and still you haven't figured it out. Blaming yourself for being a curse pfft what kind of clichè ass drama is that.

But believe whatever you want. Give yourself pity parties, have guilt in your heart.

Because the truth is a lot more twisted than you think.

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