(One Piece) Book of Oneshots and Such

Selfishness

(Lawlu) Law is hesitant to act out on his feelings.

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The muggy air of Zou wasn't something that Law enjoyed, but it was inevitable due to the fact that they were in the middle of an unruly forest.

Though it was good to see his crew, his navigator, his unquestionable nakama, after having spent so long with the Strawhats, somehow they seemed less.. unusual to him.

Regretfully his nakama consisted of a bunch of emotional idiots- that, he never could change, but after spending a month and a half with a man who far surpassed the definition of dumbass, suddenly his crew looked a lot smarter.

Honestly...

Slacking back and allowing his crew to hound him, as they all collectively barked out their disastrous tales and great misadventures, he allowed his mind to trail off freely, knowing Bepo would give him a recap after things cooled down.

At first the raven relished in his newfound freedom from the demon that has been haunting him for over a decade, then he relived the battle that changed his life's course forever, finally he ended up thinking of the warrior who he owed it all to.

One rubbery pirate captain that he- he- he felt obligated to assist, yeah, after doing him such a big favor, Law felt it was only natural to follow through with his promises and help the teen face Kaido.

Cursing the redness glowing on his face, the Heart captain hid his eyes underneath the cap of his hat and exhaled tiredly.

Why couldn't he stop thinking about one Monkey D. Luffy?

At first the boy was only a new, unexpected, yet very welcome variable added to his conclusive scheme, a hidden ace up the sleeve, an opportunity, an extra pawn on his chessboard, yes, the boy was nothing but a resource he could take advantage of.

At first.

However as time wore on, by the time Caesar was taken captive, he came to the conclusion that he wasn't in as much control as he thought he was.

He had no choice but to completely change his previous opinions of the crew within a single day of associating with them.

Nope, the Strawhats were wildcards, loose cannons, stray bullets, too free spirited and a wee smarter than Law gave them credit for.

Obviously he had underestimated them as a functioning whole, including the lighthearted captain who proved to have more resolve then he ever did.

Oh there was irony in that he was sure.

Law honestly felt a small spark of embarrassment within himself when he first saw Luffy quite literally send Doflamingo to the depths of hell.

To think that he once believed Luffy was to be his backup, a truly shortsighted concept.

Luffy was so much more than a pawn by the end of things, in fact, it seems the boy has quite taken the reins from his fists and rushed forwards.

His resolve was steeled and strong, a wild spirit who refused subjugation, and funnily enough- even if he was manipulated into someone's reach, he still wasn't something to be controlled, it just ended up making a mess.

Frustratingly, both he and Doflamingo made the mistake of trying to bend him to their wills, only to fail.

A bitter thought, to think that even though his Corazon did everything he could to keep the raven far away from such a monster, after all these years he still behaved like him in some aspects- something that Law knew would probably never vanish.

Although at least he knew unlike that bastard, he learned from his shortcomings and flaws, and overcame them to reach his goals.

Just like how he had to bite down on his pride and leave everything to the young pirate with an eerily cheerful grin, the pirate that just existed to be free like the sea, the pirate that smelled of cooked meat and earth, the pirate that lived so innocently despite all the cruelties and hardships, the pirate that-

Clicking his tongue in annoyance, Law grit his teeth, feeling his heart inflate- making him feel as if the muscle was going herniate and spill onto the ground.

Shit, seething silently in denial, the Heart captain blinked confusedly, only seeing the memories he's made on the brightly coloured boat with the man who owned it, his comforting smile, his light and breezy personality, all he could recount was the many days and nights he had to get to know him so intimately.

By now Law was certain he was the only outsider who got to be so close to the captain and crew, who got to hold him within arms reach during vulnerability, who managed to receive such trust and respect.

How he felt about such information.. Law didn't want to dwell on it lest he lose his head.

Around this time he knew this wasn't a platonic respect he felt for the other man anymore.

But he would never confront it either, how could he? When Luffy was the center of his very own universe, when he gravitated everyone within his vicinity, when he offered nothing but wonder and anticipation?

Luffy was a sun, a star that people looked to with faith and hope and a hint of a gamble, Luffy was nothing but everything righteous and good in the world- but he was also just as unpredictable.

Then there was him, a dark doctor feared by many, a man of countless sins and regrets, a foolish man of pride, of selfishness.

Luffy was selfish- but Law's lust was far less innocent then the boy's bottomless gluttony, if the Strawhat captain was a sun, then he was the equivalent of a black hole, sucking in the light greedily but never actually regaining any light from when he was a star himself.

Law knew, that if he ever allowed his greed to try and take the sun that was Luffy for his own, he'd only end up destroying that light.

Leaving nothing behind but an even deeper hole.

He'd never forgive himself for tarnishing something so beautiful, so miraculous, he could never live with himself for bringing the one he admired to ruin.

Dare he say loved.

So he stayed silent, mulling in his own thoughts that would never be spoken aloud.

Never to meet the light of day, or the ears of a certain sun.