Song of a Trickster

Chapter 16

Devyn's POV

Blinking my eyes open the white walls come into focus. Sitting up the heartache of yesterdays news settles in. I cover my face as the tears fall. I don't hear the door open, or the footsteps, but I feel the arms wrap around me, 

"shh, it's okay, I'm here Devyn.."Millie's voice whispers, 

Turning into her chest I grip her arm tight as the sobs wrecked my body. She held me and rubbed my arm gently, whispering soothing things. The pain in my heart was burning, pulling, tearing. I gasped for breath as I thought my heart was going to break. My chest so tight. I felt everything and nothing at the same time, it hurt but I was numb. I was sad, I was angry..I was confused. Slowly the burning subsided and I sat up, moving across the bed, making space for Millie to sit next to me. Silence. That's how it was. I don't know why I did it. The question formed in my head and my mouth moved before I could think. Did I want to know? Could I handle it? I didn't know but it was too late...

"was it him?"I croaked, 

Millie looked at me, eyes tinted red from crying, her face screwed up in confusion, 

"w-what?"

I didn't look at her, my eyes burning holes into the bedsheets, 

"was it him.."

"I don't know.."She stammered, 

My head snapped up to look at her, 

"Did the Joker kill him?"

She sighed and it was her turn to put her head down, 

"We think it was..however the only person that apparently saw him.. was Gordon.. so one else saw him but there were a dozen of his men posing as our troops at the ceremony, we only caught 4 of them."

I screwed my eyes shut and took a deep breath in, 

"where are the 4 you caught?"

"In our cells down at-"

"let them go"

Millie jumped, shocked, "w-what? why? they're an asset to him"

"no they're not"Millie didn't talk, just watched me, "Those men would of only known the bare basics of the plan, not the reason behind it, no questions asked, he will expect you to question them, batter them, he would of gave them false information, he trusts no one. Letting them go will put a fork in his plans. maybe even buy you a few days.."

"In a few weeks how did you manage to analyse him so well and learn how he works.."Millie asks, 

"If I could tell you, you wouldn't believe me"I sigh, 

She holds one of my hands in hers and I look at her. I saw pity in her eyes, I didn't like it, 

"you can tell me anything..you know that. I won't ever judge you"

I shake my head, "just trust me, when it's right. I'll tell you"

"okay...I need to go, I'll let the 4 men go"she stands from the bed, 

I nod and give her a weak smile, "thank you Millie"

She walks back over and presses a kiss to my forehead gently and hugs me before leaving. All this time I've defended Jack, saying him hurting me wasn't him or he wouldn't do it. But only once was that true, he was willing to hurt me when I was first taken by him, and the car exposion, he knew my line of work..maybe he knew I was there, he knew I worked closely with Gordon and must of known how it would hurt me if he died. Am I just a toy in his game? Am I defending my future killer? I forced myself to stop thinking, I'd just dig myself into a hole other wise. 

Turning over I noitced I didn't feel much more than a bit tender rather than in pain and I hadn't been given my meds today either. Moving either body part I decided to swing my legs over the side of the bed. As I place my feet on the floor my legs sting but I grit my teeth and put more weight down, after a few seconds I added more, and more until I was stood. It burned my legs but it wasn't unbearable. I headed for the bathroom, holding the bed as support. I look at my self in the mirror. My right eye and part of my cheek has a redish mark along with my left shoulder. My legs were covered in different shades of marks. I knew these were going to scar me. My eyes burned but I didn't cry. A scream ripped its way through my throat and I threw my hands at the mirror shattering it. My hands reached up and grabbed the dressings on my body and I ripped them all off. Turning round I ripped down the shower curtain, 

"Miss Miller?!"A voice called, 

I ran to the door just in time to shut it and lock it. Screaming again I slammed my back agaisnt the wall and slid down, curling up, tears of frustration dripping down my face. Angrily I rubbed them away. Looking at the floor I could see the bloody bandages, finally looking at my hands I see where most of the explosion had hit me, my hands were covered in blood from the bandages being removed and there were blisters on my arms. Closing my eyes I hadn't meant to fall asleep. 

I woke up to the door being unlocked, looking up I saw 2 nurses. They walked over to me and I moved away, 

"no, leave me alone"

"Miss we need to bandage you"

"no! I want to leave"I say, 

They force me to stand and I shout in pain, their hands burning my skin, 

"Get off me!!" I screetch, 

Pushing them away I run out of the room and down the hall, I had no clue where I was going but I needed to leave. I couldn't go back to Millie or Shane they'd bring me back here and Jamie would try to control me again so thats a no. As I got out of the building I ran down the main road and headed for the center of the city. My body and skin burned like hell but I ignored it and kept going. I turned and crossed the road, suddenly I see headlights. I brace myself and try to move but now I've stopped the pain is un bearable. The car stops just before me and I drop to my hands and knees, shaking,

"Devyn?!"