This Isn't Love

Chapter 12- Help

I sit up with my breathing quick and my heart pounding. "Jin! Jin calm down it's okay. Breathe" I look over to see Yoongi with his face contorted in worry and I let out a strangled cry "why did you say that Yoongi! Why did you know and not help!! Why!!!" He looked taken aback and gripped my hand in his. "Jin what are you talking about?" He asks and I try to pull away from his touch "you told me you knew! Y you said you wouldn't help me!" I say and tears fill his eyes. "Jin I don't know what your talking about. You came to my room and I told you I didn't know why you were hurting and then you passed out" my hands tremble at that and I could hear a frantic beeping noise.

Nurses rush in and Yoongi backs away as one tries to calm me down and the other takes a needle and as gently as possible sticks it in my skin. I try not to struggle but it was difficult until my body started to calm and I felt like I could finally breathe. The beeping noise became less frantic and started to move at a steadier pace. "Everything's okay sweetheart let me get Dr. Chen, is that okay?" I try to manage a nod and she gives me a little smile and makes me lay back more because I was slightly sitting up. She leaves after the other nurse and I felt so sick it was insane.

I close my eyes softly forgetting about Yoongi until I hear soft little cries. I open my eyes and see Yoongi with his head in his hands and his body shaking. "I'm sorry I yelled at you Yoongi.....can you please give me a hug" I say and he looks up and comes over to give me a gentle hug. He lets out hiccup like cries and I rub his back.

"I hate interrupting these moments but I need to ask a few questions to Kim SeokJin" Yoongi separates from me while wiping his eyes and sits down in one of the chairs on the side of the room. As the doctor was about to ask me the first question the others come in with an upset nurse right behind them. They looked shocked to see my uncovered arms filled with bruises and the abnormally sharp bones. The doctor didn't look impressed and looked at me "is it okay that they are in here?" I look over to meet Namjoon's eyes and nod.

"Now I assume you don't know why your here exactly due to the fact you were unconscious upon entry. You had passed out and so we ran some blood tests to make sure everything was going normally in your body due to it not being normal to randomly pass out. Everything came out negative except that your vitals were extremely low. It seems that your weight isn't normal for your height, so I do have to ask a few questions about your eating and sleeping habits." I nod softly and he clicks his pen to get ready to write. "First though may I know how you got all those bruises? We are required to ask encase there is a domestic abuse situation going on."

The room goes sickeningly quiet as all eyes were on me. "I'm j just super c clumsy" I say trying to get my voice to steady. He nods and writes it down and I just look down at my fingers. My knuckles were badly bruised from constantly throwing up unwanted food. But the bruises didn't stop there, they went against my skin in moments where not even Namjoon could find the love in me. "Now what time do you usually go to sleep?" He asks and I was about to say a random early time until a voice cut over mine.

"He doesn't. Doctor I think your missing the real point here look at him. Isn't it obvious at this point? I mean shouldn't doctors be able to tell and see there's a problem?" Yoongi says and I look up quickly "I'd like to hear it from the patient, but thank you. Now Mr. Kim what time do you usually go to sleep at?" He asks and looks at me. "Well I have to do a lot around the house so usually 1 or 2" I say and he writes it down. "How often do you eat?"

I didn't know how to respond to that. How could I knowing that even if I said the right thing I'd still get hurt. "Mr. Kim?" I look up and nod "sorry yeah. I eat all the time, probably too much even" I say and he writes something down. "We weren't able to check your weight since you were unfortunately passed out so we checked for physical signs instead. While checking for physical signs we did see that you had a lot of scarring on your back. With that we are also required to make you fill out a mental health section in these documents" he hands he a clipboard, "now you don't have to do this right now as we are going to be holding you here for two more days just to make sure your health becomes more stable and secure." I nod choosing its not best to speak when Namjoon's in the room.

"Now I'll give you some time to make yourself comfortable" he says and leaves the room going into the hall. "Why do you have so many bruises!? It's not normal Jin and were going to talk to bang pd! Unless you tell us what the hell is going on!" Jimin yells and I rub my arm and look down "I just am clumsy is all" I say and am meant by a frustrated groan "bullshit! Being clumsy doesn't get you with that many bruises! Did you hear what he said! He said you had scarring! Scarring Jin!!!" I flinch and bite my bottom lip roughly.

"S sorry" I say and pinch at my skin. "Don't do that" Yoongi says and I look at him when I stop biting my lip. "W what?" He grabs my hand softly. "Jin I know its hard because now everyone's questioning you and it feels like shit but you'll feel so much better when it's out. So you gotta trust us and you have to let us help you." I look down and shake my head "I'm fine. I just sometimes am clumsy and bump into things a lot" I say but that wasn't enough, I started to get questioned to hell by Jimin and Tae. Yoongi tried to get them to stop asking so many questions knowing that the monitor started to speed up. I really couldn't take this.

"Kookie!"