Reviews 2.0

Lead Me Astray (onebluerose)

Reviewer: onebluerose

Author: lesserknown1

Cover: 9/10 

The cover looks great! The title and author's name are all clear and readable. The background looks the right amount of sensual. It sends that sexy and tense atmosphere which I am looking forward to read in this book. The moon at the top left is okay but in my personal opinion, it looked out of place the longer I stared. On the other hand, the space would look empty without it there. The last line on the cover, I can't read though. It's just a blurred straight line. All in all, great job with the cover!

Title: 10/10 

The title sounds new to me and it is very much refreshing. It gives the idea of a perfect little world crashing down as the main character ventures into another world or finally sees life from a different angle. The title and the cover goes well together. Considering the genre and the description, I can feel the tension, the danger and the mystery. 

Description / Summary: 9/10 

The summary brings up a ton of questions upfront. It maybe a bit confusing at first but it sets clearly the foundation a reader will need to understand the story once the page is flipped to the first chapter. The main characters are introduced, the setting is also mentioned as well as the main conflict the story will revolve around. Nevertheless, there are still vital details excluded from this part that will make a reader question what it really has to offer. 

Chapter Review: 8/10 

The one thing I constantly kept noticing was that there were parts where it is not indicated who the speaker is for each dialogue. It might get confusing at times for the readers to read lines and lines of conversation wondering which character says what.

Chapter 1: The first sentence immediately sets the mood for this chapter. It has heavy impact right off the bat. The personalities of the characters differ greatly and it was shown clearly through their interaction and the thoughts of the other (Aurie's). The vocabulary used for the dialogues were also realistic, relatable and fun. On the later parts though, there was a point where the speaker was not indicated for each dialogue. It can get a bit confusing if it weren't for the way the dialogue is written or the viewpoint of the character who was speaking. I suggest the author to edit this chapter in a way that it is clearly stated which character says what. The last part of this chapter was great, starting from point where she drank the liquor. I felt and experienced the disorientation of the main character from within the screen. Aurie's thoughts were written incoherently but still very comprehensible for the reader. 

I would also like to add how this chapter reminds me of the title so much. The main character strayed from her usual routine/life which triggered the series of events that will lead her further away. This chapter was good and served well as the catalyst in Aurie's life/character development. 

Chapter 2:The thoughts of Mys make me picture a nonchalant, what-happens-happen type of person. It is such an interesting thing that she was the person the main character meets after her 'untimely demise' as Mys says it. Their combination, I find really gripping. This chapter was well written and reminds me of the ripple effect as I read further. Then again, I suggest the author to edit this chapter in a way that it is clearly stated which character says what in each dialogue. 

The last line of this chapter was a good cliffhanger. It tells the reader how there is so much more the story has to offer and just how much the main character has yet to explore as the story progresses.

Chapter 3:The first paragraph screams conspiracy to me. A gnawing feeling that it was all part of an elaborate act to cover up tracks. This opening is strong because, as reader, I would definitely want to know if my hunch was right. This chapter is also a good look on how the human world and the paranormal world exists together. How not much of or nothing at all about the paranormal is known to mortals is explained here. The cliffhanger was also good, almost foreshadowing the next events that will happen which is that the main characters' paths are about to cross. 

Activity of the Writer: 8/10 

The author sometimes replies to feedback/comments on the story. 

Plot: 10/10 

The first few chapters are shrouded with mystery. There are so many interesting points that make a reader want to continue turning the pages. The cliffhangers are good and the flow/transition is not confusing or disruptive. There are also a lot of ways the story can develop. I am curious as to the thing that could turn Aurie's fate upside down as stated in the story summary.

Overall Advice: 

The story is great. There are minimal typographical errors. Just a suggestion would be to indicate the speaker during conversations. Worldbuilding could also be improved a bit. Maybe I haven't read it yet but I am looking for certain things for example history, organization of people or their class levels in society. This is to understand the world you created better. I look forward to the character development of Aurie as well as the other two. All in all, great job! Good luck with the book. 

This is just my opinion. A single person's point of view. Please know that the things I pointed out are not flat out negativity but rooms for improvement. Also, please feel free to ask questions if you have any. Thank you for trusting me!