Such a Softer Sin Chapter 33

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Connors POV chapter now, it was a little harder to write, Murphy just comes easier for some reason.

I hope you enjoy it.

All the feels.

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It had been two days since Murphy had told Lila he loved her and she said it back, and Connor noticed the world hadn't actually fucking ended. Things didn't dramatically change or get weird. The only difference was Murphy being able to openly admit how he felt, whispering it to her a hundred times a day, making her giggle and blush like a kid that got exactly what they asked for on Christmas day. Connor still hadn't told her, but he was getting the deep urge to do so. Seeing Murphy tell her, seeing how happy it made her, it inspired him. He wanted to tell her because of Murphy, not in a competitive way, but because he had seen that he had done it, and it didn't make blood rain from the sky or the world set ablaze, it just made them really fucking happy.

She had always said she cared equally about them, she would never play favorites, and in telling Murphy she loved him, Connor knew it applied to him too. So it wasn't like he was scared she wouldn't return the sentiment anymore, because she obviously did. He was just guarded. He wasn't used to this, feeling things this intense, feeling love at all for someone other than his brother, and it was hard for him to know what to do with those feelings. He wasn't surprised his brother had just told her, no plans, nothing fancy, just the words. It was Murphy all over. And Connor was the one to push him to do so after all. He knew his brother would feel better once those words left his lips. As the days had gone on, he had seen how his brother looked ready to crawl out of his skin when he was around her, wanting so badly to tell her but being too scared. Connor was glad he gave him that push, because now his brother was free from that burden and so fucking happy it made his heart clench.

He wanted to tell her, and he would, but he wanted to plan it out. He wanted to do it in a way where he could show her too, he was never good with words. It wasn't that he wanted to outdo his brother, it wasn't like that at all and he would never dream of it. Lila knew how different they were. Murphy felt so deeply, and words just fell from his lips, he was always better with words. When Murphy spoke, he fucking meant it and it was hard for you not to take notice. Connor was more of a doer, to show her as well as tell her because deep down, he felt like the weight of his words wasn't enough.

That was why he enlisted the help of his emotional counterpart for his plan. Connor wasn't romantic in the slightest. He had never taken a girl on a date, he didn't get them gifts, he was clueless. Murphy, on the other hand, was very sentimental. He'd never cared for lass before, so it wasn't like he was more experienced than Connor, but with Murphy being so soppy, he would be better at knowing what to do. Murphy used to pick flowers from the neighbours garden and give them to their Ma when he was a young child. It would always make her smile and she'd put them in a vase on the table, and when they died, Murphy would cry. Connor never really understood why the flowers dying upset his brother so much, but Murphy would always go and pick more to replace them. That was the kind of sentimental person he was, and Connor just wasn't like that. He was a little more sentimental when it came to his brother and now Lila, but with something like this, he didn't even know where to start.

They couldn't execute his plan for another couple of hours though, and he was on edge with waiting. He was usually patient, Murphy was the one who had trouble waiting, but this was something new to him and he just wanted it over with. It didn't help that Murphy was so fucking excited about the whole thing that Connor could feel it. He knew Murphy was just excited for Connor to come out with it, so then it was all finally done and out there, completing the circle as it were. He was grateful when Murphy ended up falling asleep, head on Lilas' tummy as they just chilled on the bed talking and cuddling like they always did. Connor could finally get some semblance of peace from his twin's excited energy.

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