Painting this canvas with the colors of our love

Exam day

The day of every exam was always the worst, the most stressful day ever and even though I had done a lot of exams already I didn't seem to be getting used to it. Since I was in school my ritual was very simple, the day of something important i would do nothing at all, my hands wouldn't touch a single page of the book. Not that I had plenty of things to do at that moment since I was undergoing dialysis again and I really had nothing else to do than stare blankly at the wall until after a while I got inspired, I remembered of the rewatch of 'hotel' I had just finished a few days ago, it was one of my favorite seasons and Sally was one of my favorite characters but I realized I had never done anything with her involved. My favorite subject was Sarah, even more when I was able to portray her for real, having her in front of me and being able to observe every inch of that perfect body of hers which actually happened but just like a couple of times due to our busy lives. Cordelia was the one I had portrayed the most but Sally, she was new to my hands, I didn't really know what would've eventually come out but I just followed my instinct, got my iPad and started drawing. A couple of hours later, maybe something more, i was almost done when some noise interrupted my creative moment.
"Sarah!" I slapped my iPad cover on the screen maybe too violently but I tried to act normal anyway "What... what are you doing here?" I asked but I wasn't the one with terrific acting skills.
"Did I interrupt something?" She asked looking around like she was expecting to see someone else in the room.
"No, no, of course not" I said but then again, too quickly.
"What were you doing?" She asked looking inquiringly at me.
"Uhm nothing just trying to make the time pass faster" I said.
"A time machine project?" She joked.
"Uhm, not exactly" I remained vague but things happened faster than I could imagine and in the blink of an eye she had taken my iPad and was about to unlock it because I had set her Touch ID too. What a fool, I didn't think about something like this happening.
"Oh my gosh!" She almost screamed looking at the painting:

"Sarah, this is a hospital, please! Don't be a child and give it back to me" I tried to say in a serious tone but it just came out weird and giggly.
"This is me! I mean, Sally, but still... me!" She said standing there, her eyes compulsively switching from me to the ipad and she had that smile on, the kind that made her look like a five year old.
"Yes... That's you but it was private anyway I didn't want you to see it" I said worrying a little.
"Why...?" Her smile disappeared as she heard my words.
"Oh I didn't want you to think I'm a weirdo or obsessed... and it wasn't even finished" I said lowering my eyes.
"Sylvia... honey you have sketches of me half naked... how could i think bad things like these about you?" She asked sitting next to me.
"It was different, that was like I had asked you to pose for me, like a photoshoot but way slower I think... Oh, fuck me, whatever... you saw it now so that's it" I said just to stop myself talking nonsense.
"This is beautiful, you are talented and I always feel so flattered when you choose me as your subject and I am always excited to see what you will create, you never disappoint me" she said and those words gave me a little more confidence "Plus I had noticed not seeing you drawing much lately"
"I... I've had other problems and also I had to study... and it was really difficult to concentrate on what I was doing I didn't need anymore distraction such as drawing" I explained.
"What's happening honey?" She said taking my hand into hers leaning forward with her elbows above her knees. My eyes were caught by the little necklace I had got her but I didn't let them indulge anymore and looked straight in her eyes handing her an envelope.
She examined the paper for a while and then looked back at me "don't you want to look at what's inside?" She said handing it back at me "this is important it's from the hospital"
"No... not today, I can't risk it..." i said not taking the envelope from her hand.
"What..." she didn't look like she understood so i clarified it.
"I can't risk today's exam... If I open it and it's bad news there's nothing left i can do but pray, but i'm afraid how it might affect my exam, I can't fail it Sar-" I was cut off by her lips colliding with mine. I felt warmth radiate from my stomach every time we had such contacts but it wasn't long enough leaving me wanting for more when her lips left mine. "This is not going to be bad, okay? This is not going to be bad at all. You're going to be an amazing, smart ad caring doctor like you have always dreamed to be. Nothing is going to take you away from me, really nothing." She said and she was so convinced it almost convinced me too but the fact was she couldn't know what was written in there.
"You don't know it Sarah, how am I supposed to feel if this is bad.. I'm scared, I haven't really feared for my life as much as I am now, I just wanna delay the moment. I want do my exam, I want to pass it, I want to be happy, I want to come to that event with you tonight and just open that fucking letter tomorrow" I said "but for I can do this I need you to keep it, just until tomorrow, you can throw it somewhere and just forget about it until tomorrow" I said like it was no big deal but deep down I knew I was asking her a lot. She gulped, she wasn't expecting that but as she was before trying to convince me things were going to be alright she acted as if it wasn't a problem for her to keep it for me.
"Okay... I'll do it, I'll keep it and tomorrow we will open it together then" she said putting the letter in her bag and giving me a smile.
"Thank you" I whispered.
"So you were talking about an exam uh?" She glanced at me "Am I allowed to see this little genius mind of yours in action or you would feel anxious knowing that I am there too? You said it's one of the few oral tests you have right?" She asked.
"Yes I think it's okay if you really want to come, it's open so everyone wishing to can assist" I said as I didn't feel like turning her down after asking her an effort so big for me.
"Ok so I'll drive you to your exam, then we will have a rewarding lunch wherever you want and I'm afraid we will have to separate then for a few hours as I'm going to get ready for the event with Amanda and my stylist and we will pick you up after that to get to the place" she resumed the schedule of the day.
"Sounds like a plan" i giggled and she did too.
"I know but I am used to plan things as I always have more things to do than the actual time to do everything in a day" she laughed.
"I know I know" I giggled "Actually I was surprised you didn't mention shooting or whatever involving work in today's schedule"
"Ryan gave me a day off, he will be attending tonight's event too and we will talk tonight if it's necessary" she said but I froze, I had never met him yet, and I was so scared of he might not like me. Oh my lord what if he thinks I'm a kid compared to her... What if he finds me weird, what if he simply doesn't like me... his approval is so important for Sarah...
"Ryan... Like Ryan Murphy... He will be there..." I mumbled "oh Sarah why you want me to do this..." I cried playfully covering my face with my hands and she pulled out little laughs.
"Oh babe, you just stay by my side and I promise none will bite you" she joked caressing my hair.
"God... I know I'm going to do something stupid" I complained, she was about to reply but was cut off by a harsh beep "oh I'm done, time to go make a fool of myself for the first time today" I ironically said.
"Babe you'll be amazing, I already know, you don't believe in yourself but I do" she said and kissed my lips. "Can you go call Ali please?" I asked and she hurried to go find her, she was so caring, so cute, so beautiful... She was everything and more... I was so in love.
"Little doctor it's time to go make them see who rules" she said and she was obviously referring to my exam but I chose to play.
"Yay, as soon as you unplug me" I joked causing Ali and Sarah to laugh. She then came across and started undoing my bandage and all and Sarah was carefully looking at her. "Sari it's okay if you don't want to watch you can go out it will take just a minute" I told as I didn't want her to feel like it would be rude to leave.
"Oh no, on the contrary, I'm learning" she said and she acted sort of calm and at ease and even though she was really good at acting she couldn't control her body reaction, which was more my field, and when Ali removed the little tube in my arm I saw her turning deadly pale but still not losing her attitude.
When we were done I got up and greeted Ali and Sarah followed after me. "Try and make me proud!" She said while I was opening the door.
"That's the only thing I want to make you proud. I'll do my best Ali but I don't really know, this one is different" I said.
"Don't be a fool, she already adores you enough" Ali replied.
"That's why it scares me even more, she will be having high expectations and I don't know if I can suit them"
"Well, then at least be on time and get out of here" she smiled, I gave it back and left with Sarah.
We made our way to the university pretty silently as I was overthinking and just worrying too much about the exam while she probably knew what was going on in my head and tried to distract me "Everyone loves you already in this hospital, from patients to doctors and nurses..."
"Do you feel threatened?" I joked and smirked at her.
"Yeah I could but I'm not going to let you go so easily" she glanced at me and tightened the grip on my hand.
"I'm not going anywhere except now I'm going to leave you just for about 20 minutes but I'll be just a few steps away shitting in my pants" I said and opened the door of the classroom for her to get in first.
"Good luck, honey, you're going to be amazing" she said kissing me and taking a seat in the back of the class while I went forward to the first lines as I was the next one.
The girl before me didn't pass it and this put me in a panic state which fortunately was silenced when my name was called because I was only focused on breathing and trying to be confident that I could do it.
"So you already saw how this works. I'm going to describe a patient situation and I want you to reach a diagnosis hypothesis and of course you need to tell me the process and sperimental evidence that took you there." Professor Lowen quickly explained. She had that kind of smile they all had when they felt in the powerful position, but this time it was like she wanted to see how far I could go, how deep I mastered my knowledge or if it was just a little talent and a lot of luck, but I was determined to show her.
She started talking and I was completely focused, tensed of course, but focused. I couldn't even feel Sarah's eyes on me, she was obviously watching and listening together with the other students but it was just me and her in that moment. My brain was registering information trying to note down everything important distinguishing useless information she kept adding every now and then trying to make me miss the important ones.
As she stopped talking, she gave me a few moments to think and at the beginning I had no idea what she was talking about, I was so screwed. When I was about to lose hope something flashed in my mind like a series of words she had said connecting to one another making me see the pictured case clearly.
"I think it is enough time for you to answer if you can come up with something" she said and I locked my eyes with hers hoping I hadn't got it wrong and gave her my answer. She lingered a little more not saying a word. I fucked up, was the first thought to cross my mind. But then a smile cracked on her face and she politely said "yes miss, this is the correct answer, now go on showing me why this is the correct answer" she leaned forward only stopped by the table separating us. It was so stimulating that she felt challenged too. It wasn't only me, it was like she wanted to see how much of her knowledge she had been able to transfer on us. I pointed out the typical symptoms of the disease she had chosen and she was keeping count of them on her fingers, when she got to the right number she rose her head again and told me "this is correct again, being your answer complete you reached maximum amount of credits so it's the highest score, congratulations" she said and reached out for my hand and I shook hers smiling widely.
"Thank you" I said before leaving and she replied with a proud smile. While she went on with the next one I looked at Sarah, she was still sitting there looking at me in awe, I loved to see she was proud of me, what she thought about me was the only thing that mattered to me even more of a grade on an exam. We both hurried out the classroom and as soon as the door shut close she jumped, her legs encircled my waist while her arms were around my neck. Fortunately I was quick enough to catch her legs so that I was now holding her up. "I knew, I fucking knew you were going to be brilliant. I'm so proud I can't even explain it" she said kissing me everywhere around my face and I started laughing, it was release, happiness and the fact that I hadn't realized what had just happened.
"Ok ok" I said putting her down because I needed to breathe "I can't... What the fuck just happened?!" I thought my face must have looked hilarious because Sarah broke in her compulsive laugh "it was terrific, looked like you knew the answer from the beginning and you were just playing with her" she said and she looked sincere, she was thrilled, and excited while I just felt exhausted.
"I need to sit down" I said leaning my back against the wall and slowly sitting on the floor, when Sarah saw me there she kneeled down beside me.
"Honey what's up? Talk to me" she said shaking my arm gently.
"I'm ok I'm ok. I just..." i brushed my face with my hands "this is not a dream" I said still trying to process.
"Hell no" she chuckled "this is so sooo true honey, you're a winner" she said stroking the back of my head.
"I did it" I whispered to her lips that were so close to mine as her forehead was leaning against mine.
"Yes! Honey, let's go now you really need to eat something and tell everyone about the good news." She said and offered me her hand, she helped me standing up from the floor and let me lean my arm on her shoulders and holding my hand.
"I can't believe it still..." I mumbled.
"I see" she chuckled softly and hugged my waist with her free arm.
She drove at a place she knew for lunch saying it was time to let her spoil me a little after all I had done and the idea didn't sound bad at all so I didn't protest.
"You always cook for me and make me taste Italian food of heaven but I can't cook, I can only take you to fancy places where the food is worth the ride" she said while sitting in front of me at the table.
"I just hope there's something I can eat" I whispered.
"Oh... I hadn't thought about that but we can leave if-"
"No... no i just want to stay, I want to have lunch with you and have fun like it always is when I'm with you, I don't care about food" I said smiling and she smiled back.
"Okay we're staying then" she said playing with her necklace.
"Is there something wrong?" I said reaching her hand on the table.
"No, no nothing is wrong, actually it was a pretty good day so far" she said referring to my exam.
"Yeah, an amazing day" I said thinking about the joy in my parents voice when I had told them the news on the phone, they were proud and happy about me being happy even though I didn't mention getting the results of my other kind of exams. That day would have been perfect if it wasn't for that thought always there in the back of my mind and I didn't feel like I was able to wipe it away because it kept coming back.
Me and Sarah had the most playful and relaxed lunch in a while and I really enjoyed it. I was craving for her company, her happiness, her contagious laugh and unconventional ideas of games to play at a restaurant like throwing cocktail's olives into one another's mouth seeing who could catch the highest number. But as strange as it may seem I was in when she first proposed the game already because I felt like I was free to be 100% the real me, and I didn't give a damn if throwing olives to one another was something you don't do at the restaurant, I was just going to play and hope to catch at least one of them.
She then ate fries from my fingers and of course I didn't miss the chance to accidentally miss her mouth and put it into her nose instead which caused her to sneeze and I could barely hold back the laughter at a reasonable volume.
"You're so cruel" she said while sneezing and somehow this made the whole thing even more hilarious.
"I'm sorry but I couldn't help" I said trying to catch my breath and wiping tears from the side of my eyes.
"Ok I'm done with fries somehow..." she glared at me, "I'm going to get dessert and then we can go." She said.
I must admit I hadn't realized how much I had missed good food until I saw that giant cup of ice cream when the waiter put it down on Sarah's side of the table.
She was eating silently as she was focused on the ice cream and I was just observing her, her gestures, her smile, her hair and flawless face.
"You look like someone who wants to taste my ice cream, am I wrong?" She said pulling me back up from the abyss of my thoughts.
"I could never take your ice cream knowing how much you love it" I giggled but I really wanted to taste it.
"But today is a special day" she said holding the spoon right in front of my mouth, I tried to refuse but it was really hard so at the end I gave in and tasted it but then it happened, revenge, she raised the spoon and it touched the tip of my nose, leaving me with a large chocolate-colored stain on my nose which I tried to wipe away as fast as I could.
"Revenge is a dish best served cold" she giggled "ice cream cold" she then laughed loudly.
"Ha ha so funny" I said challengingly looking at her "fine, we're even, can't wait for the next time to see who wins"
"But I like to play until I win" she smirked eating the last spoon of ice cream.
I shook my head in exhaustion "You're going to drive me crazy you know that?" I chuckled.
"And this is not even half of what I can do" she said sticking her tongue out swaying it up and down miming something that made my cheeks burn red when I understood. I threw the napkin right on her face "stop it, you pervert"
She giggled "ok I'll let you rest... for now" she said "but just because we really need to go" she said and got up to pay but I stopped her.
"No way you're paying hun, we're celebrating your exam remember? This one is on me" she said. I tried insisting a little more but the she handed the money to the waiter so I gave up.
"I'll drive you home so you can rest for a while and get ready ok?" She asked.
"Yeah ok" I said heading back to the car.
I was about to get out the car when she said "Uhm... babe?"
"Yeah babe?" I said turning around to face her.
"I really need to pee" she said biting her lower lip as if she was asking for permission.
"You're lucky because I have a bathroom" i chuckled "come in" I said and invited her inside.
When I closed the door and threw my bag on a chair I turned around and I saw a beautiful dress on my bed.
"This was you Sar?" I said smiling taking the beautiful cloth in my hands.
"Uuhmm yeah maybe... someone told me you were going to attend a glamorous event" she chuckled.
"Sari You didn't have to... oh my... how can I repay you for this" I said looking at her.
"Did you like it?" She asked
"Of course, this is just perfect" I said smiling widely.
"Then this smile is my reward" she said and cupped my face to kiss me.
"But still pee wasn't just an excuse" she chuckled and ran into the bathroom leaving me to admire that dress. What did I do to deserve her? I didn't know the answer to that question but the thought that little envelope in her bag could have made me loose her forever wouldn't leave my mind.
"Uuh you definitely liked it" she said catching me examining every inch of that amazing dress "green is your color babe"
"Oh yeah?" I asked as I really didn't know, I wasn't used to look at me carefully in the mirror, it was more a quick look like 'am I inhumanly ugly today?' If it was a no I was already gone out but if it was a yes I would try and fix it.
"Sure... it matches your skin perfectly, can't wait to see you tonight, but I must go now Amanda's already freaking out" she kissed me on the forehead and I smiled.
"See you later" I said while she was making her way to the door. She just smiled back and closed the door leaving me there alone.

Hey there! As usual if it looks weird as a chapter and not fitting the story I just wanna tell I had to split the chapter in two because it really was too long so... please be patient and and bear with me 😂 I hope you liked it anyway and also the drawing is really mine, in case anyone was wondering 😅