22 Short Stories from Gravity Falls

Story 9: The Old Lady on Parpan Place

Summary: When Dipper and Mabel are sent out to sell several of Grunkle Stan's excess Bobbleheads, they come across an old lady who has a very dark and very creepy obsession with dolls. Inspired by an ACTUAL scrapped episode idea for Gravity Falls that also was nearly part of the Real life Journal 3.

"Come on Mabel, we're almost there!" yelled Dipper.

"I'm coming! Ugh...these Stan bobbleheads are ridiculously heavy!" she yelled back, dragging the bag behind her.

Earlier in the year, Stan had ordered a couple of Mr. Mystery bobbleheads for the shack from a new seller. But by accident, they had delivered 50,000 bobble heads all at once rather than the 5 test ones Stan had asked for. With a surplus of merchandise and the company having a no refund policy (of which Dipper called a taste of Stan's own medicine), he had ordered Dipper and Mabel to go around town to try and sell as many of the bobbleheads as they could. Even threaten customers if need be.

Now, after multiple attempts to sell the merchandise (and a few lawsuits being threatened), the twins were approaching the last potential customer, a small old house at the end of Parpan Place. A street best described by Mabel as, "a scene out of a generic Hollywood horror movie!" Abandoned houses lay all around as they reached the front door of the one remaining inhabited house.

"You knock," said Mabel.

"What?! Why me?" asked Dipper.

"Because, you're closer to the door, and I'm tired from carrying all these bobbleheads. I told you we should have stopped for lunch! There was a great two for five sale on burgers at Greasy's diner today!" said Mabel as she sat down on the curb, "And you know how much I like eating Dip."

Dipper rolled his eyes and knocked the door. There was no response.

"Looks like no one's home. You sure this is the right address?" asked Mabel.

"Definitely. See, one eight six, Parpan Place," said Dipper as he pointed to the house on the map.

Mabel got up and knocked the door again, but harder. After a few seconds, there was still no response.

"Guess it's abandoned too," she said.

As Mabel opened up a pack of raw sugar to tie her hunger over, the door swung wide open. An old lady, no taller than Soos's Abuelita stood there.

"Oh my, aren't you both the most precious looking things ever," she said, "What can I do for you both? Let me guess, Girl's Scout's cookies? In that case..."

"Oh no ma'am, we're not girl's scouts. And by the way, that's my brother," said Mabel mockingly.

Dipper frowned.

"Oh, pardon me dear," said the old lady, "So, what can I do for you instead?"

"Well, me and my brother Dipper here are trying to sell some of these bobbleheads and we were wondering if you're interested in buying one?" said Mabel as she pulled one out of her bag.

"I know they're really creepy but we're a bit desperate for someone to buy them," said Dipper.

He expected the lady to say no or politely turn down the offer. Instead...

"Oh, more precious babies for my collection! How lovely! I'll take some off your hands, dear!" said the lady.

Dipper felt an uneasiness in his stomach the moment she said that.

He pushed Mabel to the side as he gestured to the lady he'd be right back!

"I don't know about this Mabel," he said, "I think we should make a run for it."