22 Short Stories from Gravity Falls

Story 11: Something

Summary: When Grunkle Stan sets up a new money making scheme, he sends Dipper and Mabel out on a hunt to find something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.

"Soos, handle that white gown with care!" yelled Stan, "It's made of linin! Or is it linen?"

"Woah Grunkle Stan," said Dipper, "Are you planning a wedding again?"

"What, no!" he yelled, "Apparently, a lot of newly weds drive by here on their honeymoons and I wanted to give the shack a more wedding type feel."

"Did someone say wedding?!" yelled Mabel as she bolted into the gift shop from the living room like she was on a sugar rush.

"False flag Mabel," said Dipper, "Just another one of Grunkle Stan's money-making schemes."

"Oh, that reminds me," said Stan as he dug into his pocket and pulled out a list, "I need you kids to go into town and find these things."

Dipper looked at the list, "Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue? Grunkle Stan, what's all this?"

"Well apparently, this is from some old poem about weddings and if I wanna have good luck or something, I need those items," he said.

"But Grunkle Stan, you already have something old," said Mabel as she lifted up a mirror to him.

Stan rolled his eyes as Dipper and Mabel laughed.

"Alright, just for that, I'm giving you both until this evening to find all those things or you're both on bathroom duty!"

The twins quivered in disgust before leaving to find the items on Stan's list as they didn't want to clean the bathrooms.

"So, where will we find something old?" asked Mabel.

"Mabel, we're in a town that still doesn't have wi-fi in every building," said Dipper, "It's not a matter of if there's something old here, it's what do we want to take?"

"Hey, I found an old car in the woods once," said Mabel, "Would that work?"

"That's too heavy," said Dipper, "Hang on, there was that old bucket from Pioneer's day that someone left behind the water tower. We could use that."

The twins ran off to the water tower where the bucket lay. Mabel then inspected it.

"Nope. No made in China labels," she said.

"Perfect, then it must be old," said Dipper, "Next, we need to find something new. Well that'll be tough."

"Not exactly," said Mabel, "We can just go to the mall and buy something."

"But according to the rules, we can't buy the things. It's all things we must find ourselves," said Dipper.

"Ah poop," said Mabel as she put the bucket on her head.

"Wait, Wendy told me that her brother just broke his brand-new phone. The rules said the thing has to be new but nothing about it being broken," said Dipper.

"Given this bucket on my head has holes in it and could never hold water, or...eww, you do not wanna know what this bucket used to hold, but I think you get my point," said Mabel.

"Great. Now come on," said Dipper as he began to run to Wendy's house.

Mabel, ran in the opposite direction with the bucket on her head and crashed right into one of the water tower legs.

"Oh, and take that bucket off your head," yelled Dipper.

"Gladly!"

Once Mabel was back on her feet, the twins raced to Wendy's house where her brother gladly let them have his broken new phone in exchange for them (and Wendy) to stay quiet about it.