22 Short Stories from Gravity Falls

Story 18: Corduroy Robbery

Summary: Inspired by an actual scrapped B-Plot from Gravity Falls, Grunkle Stan tries to teach Wendy the art of being a small time crook. But when she takes things too far, both of them learn a valuable lesson.

"Wendy, we gotta talk," said Stan as he gestured her to come into his office.

Wendy walked in nervously as she put her hands in her pocket.

"Have a seat," he said.

"Uh, is everything okay Mr. Pines?" she asked.

"I'll cut to the chase. I saw you on my surveillance system, shoplifting a few chocolate bars...and a snow globe from the giftshop."

Wendy's heart sank. She knew it looked bad on her side, but she had a legitimate reason to do it. Earlier in the day she had gotten into a heated argument with her dad, Manly Dan. He was mad at her for constantly getting into trouble and hanging out with friends who he felt were bad influences on her. He had threatened to ground her if she got into trouble again. In her frustration over it, she grabbed those items from the gift shop to try and take her mind off of it. Now she felt that her job was in jeopardy too.

She put her head down in shame, "I'm so sorry Mr. Pines. I know...I'm in a boat load of trouble. Are...are you gonna fire me?"

"Far from it," he replied.

Wendy looked up.

"You've got a real gift there, Corduroy. You're the best thief I've ever seen!"

What?" she said, confused.

"The way you effortlessly snatched those chocolate bars off the shelf and the way you took that snow globe. It takes a seasoned thief like me to see one in the making."

"Uh...thank you?"

"Think about it, Wendy. You and me! I've been waiting my whole life to discover someone who's as good a pickpocket as I am."

"Really?"

"Really! You and me, we could go out there and...knock down a bank or something."

Wendy still had some doubts, but it made her feel proud to hear someone actually acknowledging her talents instead of being mad at her."

"Really, Mr. Pines?"

"Not yet," said Stan, "You're not ready...yet."

Stan took Wendy out into town to prepare her and teach her how to be a small-time crook. The two start off with simple things like knocking over hot dog carts and setting off car alarms. Soon though, as Wendy got better and better, Stan upped the antics. They then began minor shoplifting. A bag of potato chips here, a candy bar there, Stan even managed to steal two Brolex watches (which would later turn out to be fakes). By that afternoon, the two had racked up a considerable amount of crimes.

"I gotta admit Mr. Pines," said Wendy, "I had my doubts at first, but this was actually pretty fun."

"See," said Stan, "You have a real gift when it comes to thievery. Reminds me of me when I was your age."

Wendy laughed, "Must've been a long time ago."

Stan rolled his eyes.

"You know Mr. Pines; this stuff is pretty small time compared to the things you've done."

"You gotta start off small and work your way to the big jobs, Wendy."

"I feel like we could do a big job," she said, "And I got just the idea. Tonight! You and me. We're gonna steal the diamond from the Gravity Falls History Museum!"