Niall's Cancer Battle: A 1D Fanfic

Chapter Eight: Can't Sleep

**A/N** Hey so basically, I was hoping that if you actually really enjoy this story, that you would help me out by mentioning it to other people that you know? I'd really like for more to people to read this story! And, if you're not currently doing it, could you maaaybeee go check out my other fanfic Uncontrollable Desires? It's more of a Harry fanfic, and no one dies ;D haha. Anyways, thanks for reading and ENJOY!

**Liam's POV**

The entire hotel suite is quiet and I can hear the muffled sounds of the lads snoring. Usually I'd share the room with one of the lads, but none of them came in. They are probably still giving me space.

I'm lying on the bed with my eyes open, staring up at the white ceiling just listening to the snores of the lads'. My chest rises and falls easily. Up. Snore. Down. Snore. It's all repetitive. I had tried to sleep, but no matter how long I kept my eyes closed, I just couldn't fall into a peaceful slumber. My mind is too raced up with thoughts of today and Niall and cancer and everything just falling apart. I can't take it. I hate it. I hate it all. 

I jump out of bed before my brain gives me a heart attack - even though I doubt that's possible - and make my way towards the bedroom door. The floor doesn't squeak or give any kind of sign of me moving across it. It's just silence. Pure silence. I open the door slowly, not wanting to wake any of the boys up, and leave the room.

The door directly across from mine is wide open and I peek inside. Zayn is lying in bed with his blanket pulled around him. I can't see his face but I know it's him from the clothes strewn across the floor. I pull his door halfway closed and move on. The next room I come to is Harry's room, made obvious by the mess of curls on the bed. The blanket is barely covering him and I know he's sleeping naked, one of his bare legs are hanging out along with his chest. Harry's mouth is wide open and I silently laugh at him. There have been funny pranks pulled on Harry for having his mouth open. I leave the room quietly.

I finish walking down the hallway, looking into the last room quickly and noticing it's Niall's. I don't want to look at him while he's sleeping right now. I keep getting the feeling of just seeing him and he's not sleeping, but is actually dead...

I shake my head and clear it, forcing myself to keep walking. It takes so much willpower not to go back towards Niall's room, shake him awake, and apologize for everything I had said today. The look on his face as I yelled at him in the doctor's office was enough to send me off the edge. He was just so sure that chemotherapy was not the answer for him. He was practically saying he wanted to die. Right. Then. And. There.

I can't be in the suite anymore. I have to get out of here. I have to get some fresh air before I lose my self control again. I don't take anything with me as I put my shoes on and head out of the hotel room. I notice Lou sleeping on the living room couch and I wonder if he's the one assigned to sleep in the same room as me. I open the door slowly, glancing at him every so often, and then slip out. 

The entire building is silent as I walk out of it. It only takes a good three minutes before I'm finally outside and the cold air is happily welcomed to cool my heated body. I start walking in no particular direction.

Step. Step. Step. My feet are the only source of sound right now. There's no one outside, no car going by, not even the melodic sounds of crickets chirping. It's just silence and I love it. I didn't need any kind of paparazzi right now, or the crazy screaming girls asking to have sex with me. 

I pass a store window and look inside at the things displayed. Five manequins with familiar clothing on are posing in the window. I notice the gigantic poster taped to the glass. One Direction clothes sold here! Girl styles of One Direction sold here! All of our smiling faces are on the poster and I frown at it. We all looked so genuinely happy...it wouldn't be that way anymore...

A new rush of anger and sorrow hit me and I have to keep walking. I have to get away from the smiles and the taunting. The poster just screamed life and happiness. It was taken at a time when Niall's cancer didn't exist. When we had all just known that this was what we wanted to do for the rest of our lives. Together. 

"ARGHH!" I groan loudly and kick down a trash can, watching as it clashes down loudly and spills over. I leave it and keep walking. My hands are shaking, my eyes are blurry from tears, and goddamnit I don't care. "I HATE THIS!" I scream and punch a wall I pass. My fist stings and I think I've bruised a couple of my knuckles but I keep walking. The tears stream down my face but I don't wipe them away. 

"I FUCKING HATE YOU! WHY! WHY! WHY!" I scream and thrown down another trashcan I pass. Every "WHY" I scream is punctuated by another kick to the trashcan until it rolls into the street, its contents littering the streets and sidewalk. I'm shaking harder than ever and I feel like I'm experiencing my own earthquake. My brain...it hurts. I can't...

"PLEASE!" I scream. 

I take off running faster and harder than I've ever pushed myself. I just go. 

**LOUIS'S POV**

I was awake when Liam left and I followed him. I keep a good distance between us but I can still his every scream and groan. I can see his body shaking and his fists clenched at his sides. He's so upset and I feel sorry for him. I'm technically the oldest, but he's always the more parental one, always keeping us in check. Now that it was him suffering in sorrow, I just didn't know what to do. He was the one who comforted us...not me. I make jokes and make the lads laugh. 

"I HATE THIS!" He screams and I watch as he punches a wall. I cower back a bit, scared of this Liam. His hurt, his anger...it's all laid out in the open right now. He's so open and vulnerable. 

I pull out my phone and call Harry. Ring. Ring.

"I FUCKING HATE YOU! WHY! WHY! WHY!" Liam is attacking a trashcan with his foot, kicking it out into the deserted street. I'm shaking from being so frightened. I want to comfort him but I'm afraid to approach him when he's in this state of mind. Ring. Ring. 

I'm stepping forward, constantly moving closer to him. I should just try to calm him down. Ring.

"PLEASE!" It his last scream and I can hear all the raw emotions in it. My heart breaks for him. And I watch as he sprints off running. 

"Huulllooo?" Harry finally answers the phone and his voice is groggy and tired. He slurs and I can hear his loud breathing into the phone. "What's wrong Lou? Why don't you just come in the room?" He groans and I hear the bed spring as he moves. 

"Because I'm not at the hotel Hazz. I followed Liam. He's upset. I don't think he's taking the news very well. He's outside, running and I-" I choke off and can't continue my sentence. I'm so upset from seeing Liam like that. "Please come down and pick me up," I whisper into the phone and feel the tears roll down my cheeks. 

"I'll be there in a moment. Don't worry boo, we can get Liam back to normal. I promise," Harry says before he hangs up the phone. I stand there with my phone still pressed to my ear in the middle of the sidewalk. I don't want to move.

A bright flash comes from across the street and I spin in the direction it came from. A man with a large camera steps out of the bushes and smiles at me before snapping more pictures. Then, he jumps in a parked car and drives off.

"Great," I groan and sit on the edge of the sidewalk. Those pictures along with whatever he heard and probably more lies, would be all over newspapers and the media by morning. Was there nothing we did that could remain a secret?!

**A/N** Thank you for reading, please vote! Also suggest to anyone you know! Please check out my other 1D Fanfic, Uncontrollable Desires. 

-Kathleen (: