imagines | shawn mendes

polaroids

[ phrases and paragraphs written in cursive are flashbacks in this]

~

you took a deep breath, your shaky hands reaching for the door knob and twisting it slightly causing the door to open revealing the room you've feared to enter for so long. it was your old bedroom, filled with memories and your child and teenage hood deepest secrets. you slowly walked in taking the all so familiar cologne in and looking at the image in front of your eyes.
in you inner-eye you could see your 17 year old self sitting on your bed together with shawn who embraced your body in his arms. you could hear the laughters you two used to share, the promises you made and all the stories you shared filled your ear and you smiled sadly to yourself. sitting on your bed, you wandered with your hand over the sheets and closing your eyes. you furrowed your eyebrows as you noticed that one of your drawer stood slightly open exposing a silver box. you stood up, opened the drawer fully and taking the small box in your petite hands.
tracing your fingers above of the box you decided to open it. a gasp escaped your lips when you saw what was inside.

polaroids.
tons of polaroids of your sixteenths and seventeenths years of life. you placed them on your bed, going through them and remembering almost every situation behind the pictures.
one of them caught your eye, you picked it up and mustered it. what you saw was an image of you and shawn cuddled up in a dark blue blanket on your secret place. it was shawn and your place, whenever you could you would go there. always together. there wasn't a single time where you went there without him by your side.
it was a small lake, not far from where you lived, hidden in the woods and the most wonderful place on earth. it was so special, you and shawn would stay there until late at night and just listened to the water and birds. you would watch the stars for hours while sharing your deepest thoughts.

"i just- i feel so useless. i will never compare to her and that makes me so jealous! am i a bad human for feeling that way?" you asked while looking up to the millions and millions of stars above you.

"no! not at all. besides, it's not even true. y/n you are in so many ways way better than her. just because she maybe has a bigger audience in school and is the stupid popular girl doesn't mean you are less talented! you are incredible and everyone who knows you knows that for sure." shawn said, turning from his back to his side so he could face you. he intertwined your hands and smiled at you. "i love you y/n, so deeply. she could never make me feel the things i feel about you."

you teared up at the thought, you could almost laugh at the problems you two had at that point of your lives. so much had changed in that time...
you picked up another one of shawn and yourself, this one was at one of your friend's party. Shawn and you smiled widely at the camera, shawn's arm was hooked around you keeping you close to him. you cuddled into him, you still know how carefree and happy you felt that day. maybe the alcohol owned a little credit for that but mostly it was because of the people you were around.