Why Can't I Live In a Quiet Peaceful Life?!

Episode 17: Fun in the Sun

"Well, that's what vacation is about," said Kaleb.

"Huh?" replied Neos, unamused, "I seriously doubt that."

"I can agree with Kaleb here," smiled Jak as he took off his shirt.

"Why thank you, Jak," replied Kaleb, "The point of vacation is going to the beach, and looking at the bodies of girls! No matter how disproportionate their bodies are and how perfect they may seem! Remember to wear your sunglasses so they don't catch you staring!"

"Hoho!" commented Brian, "I've got more to do than measly looking! I've done a little research before we got to this island, and I've looked at an urban legend known as the Teethmonger. It supposedly a giant shark! I plan on finding it and cooking it for dinner!"

—

Everyone came out of the restroom and immediately headed toward the beach. Typical beach episodes include lots of fanservice, but since this has almost no images, there aren't any. The fanservice just has to be filled in with actual plot.

Kaleb and Jak sat down on mats, looking at the "aesthetic view of the beach" with their sunglasses. Neos stared at them with disappointment.

Jazz came up to them and said, "Hey, do you guys want to play in the sand? I've got a pair of shovels here."

"Sure thing," replied Neos, "Jak, Kaleb. You better join too. If you don't, I'll expose your real intentions.."

"What a traitor, Neos," whispered Kaleb.

Kaleb sat down on the sandy ground, disappointed that his plans were ruined. Then, Neos and Jazz came up holding shovels. They shoveled some sand and began dumping it on Kaleb.

"Hey!" said Kaleb, "What are you guys doing?"

"We're going to bury you in sand," smiled Jazz.

"It's just for the photo op," commented Neos, "We'll unbury you later!"

After a few minutes, Kaleb was in the ground, buried in sand. Only his head was showing up in the sandy beach. After Neos took the photo, Jazz and Neos went over to the rest of their friends, showing off Kaleb's picture.

"Hey guys," said Kaleb, "Can you unbury me now?"

...

Jak was patting the sand with a shovel. Then he noticed Styx walking around.

"Hey Styx," suggested Jak, "If you've stopped ignoring me because I manipulated the laser tag scores, can I offer you to help me build a sand building?"

"Sand building?" asked Styx curiously.

"People usually build a sand castle whenever they go to the beach. However, I'm going to build a sand building, which is technologically more advanced than a sand castle."

Intrigued, Styx went over to help Jak build a sand building. After a few minutes, they constructed a tall tower-like figure.

"It's amazing!" smiled Jak.

BOOM!

The sand building instantly collapsed by the kick of Brian's foot.

"It's World War 3 out here!" yelled Brian, as he ran towards the shore, "Brace for collateral damage!"

Styx stared at Jak, who groaned on the ground in disappointment.

...

"Hey Brian," asked Val as she walked up to the shore with Jazz, "What are you doing?"

"Shhhh," replied Brian as he sat on the watery sand, "I'm hunting for the Teethmonger, a legendary shark who I'll be using for my dinner."

"Well.. alright," said Val, "Jazz and I are just going to be swimming around."

After a few minutes of swimming, Val felt a scrape on her leg and yelled. Brian and Jazz instantly looked in her direction to notice a large shark fin hanging out of the water.

"Hoho!" yelled Brian as he rushed into the waters, "I've found you at last!"

Jazz managed to bring Val out of the water. Val's leg had a huge cut on it, possibly coming from the Teethmonger. Meanwhile, Brian was punching the shark, up to the point that his own fists were bleeding.

"You've got some pretty rough skin!" yelled Brian, "But I doubt you can take another beating!"

Brian punched the shark once more, with the shark bouncing into the air. With a kick, Brian beached the shark. As he stepped closer, he noticed the large teeth and the scaly rough skin.

"A meal fit for a king!" smirked Brian.

Adrian came up to Val with a medical kit, "Wow. You guys are pretty fearless. I've got a medical kit right here so we don't really need to call for an ambulance."

Adrian began wrapping Val's leg with a bandage after cleaning the wound up.

"Guys, can you please unbury me?" yelled Kaleb, "The waters rising a bit!"

...

During dinner, Adrian and Yuri began discussing the schedule for tomorrow. While they did this, the crew ate the food that they ordered. With an exception to Brian, who had personally cooked his own shark. Some may say that shark hunting is illegal, but the Teethmonger has had previous records of killing civilians, so Brian is doing a public service. At least, that's what Brian said.

"Tomorrow night," smirked Yuri, "We'll be camping our in the woods. Tents and campfire style!"

"Oh cool," said Neos, "We could tell stories, like a supernatural kingdom, or a superhero high school."

"Or a classic adventurer tale," suggested Jak, "With goblins and dungeons."

"What about a mafia story," replied Styx, "With each mafia member having magic abilities."

"Zombie or post apocalyptic stories are most superior," said Brian as he ate his shark.

"We could all tell each individual story tomorrow," chuckled Adrian, "But for now, let's all just have a good nights sleep."

"This vacation is really fun!" said Val.