Illegal Love || PJM || KTH

1. Routine

Tapping my fingers along the sink, with the water droplets rhyming with my beat, my heart was racing the speed of sound, maybe faster. It wasn't the first one, I've tried about 6 times but the same result is appearing everytime. So who am I kidding?

Rinsing my hands, I was going nuts. Thinking about whatever I could do,but I wasn't in the right state of my mind. I was shaking, my whole body was. Disappointment and fear, that's what I was feeling.

My eyes dared to dart back and look at it, and yet another time it made me freeze,still not able to digest the truth. It was real and I can do nothing to change it. No matter how much I would still look at it. It was set. I was pregnant. And these two lines were capable of ruining my life.

Holding the test with my wet hands, I laughed at my silliness, this was the 6th test I've made for today, and yet, it still showed the same exact two lines. All of the tests laid on sink. Displaying 2 red lines. As simple as that. But the consequences were never going to be like that.

Sighing to myself, I gulped the tears that were threatening to fall, this can't be happening, I've been paying so much attention to this issue , I didn't want to commit such a mistake, but ironically, I have. I have failed miserably.

Mistakes happen, but why would they, when I have succeeded to prevent myself from getting pregnant for the past five years, I have been following the same strategy till now, what would possibly go wrong now?

I have been taking my pills at time, prevented anything from happening during my fertilization period,so this wasn't my fault. My calculations were surely right. I would never commit a mistake like this. However, how have I managed to avoid pregnancy till now?

Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I felt deceived and stabbed, did he lie to me? My face got paler, and a lump grew in my throat. We had a deal! But I wasn't sure. I can't accuse him like that. He never broke a promise with me. But this was the only thing left. Condoms, which was his responsibility. Even though I kept on checking whether he wore them each time. I was always kept alert.

Throwing some water on my face, I hoped it would help decrease the heat that was rising in me, radiating from my face. Or that it would make me wake up from this nightmare.

The sound of the door closing made me snap out of my daze, realizing I was still here, no nightmares.

I dried my hands and face quickly, starting to feel the little shake from what's about to happen, throwing the towel at the ground, I held the tests I've made in one hand, then barged out of the bathroom.

Heading towards the living room, I was welcomed with a hard chest blocking my way, which banged my head backwards, with a soft laugh, and a hand circled my waist, soft lips connected with mine for a small peck,"You should look where you're heading don't you think so?", Jimin said with a smile on his face.

Disconnecting himself from me, he walked towards the bedroom undoing his tie,"Is dinner out already?", he asked not looking backwards "I'm so hungry, I haven't eaten anything since morning".

Following him to the room, I stood by the door frame crossing my arms together hiding the tests between my folded hands, "You're one hour early", I said watching his moves. I haven't prepared anything honestly. Not after the big trauma I was facing.

"I know", he said as he sat down on the bed loosening his shoe lace, " but there were some problems at the company the last few days and it's giving me a real headache, and I decided that I needed an hour break today or else I'd lose it", he sighed heavily, " Can you please start preparing dinner?", he asked.

Nodding and humming a "sure", I decided that it wasn't the perfect time to open up the subject, cause if I do, I know it wouldn't end up well. Because 1,I wasn't going to let it pass that easily and 2, he was tired and didn't need anything to piss him off even more. Work was enough, I thought, and it won't be fine if I show up as an additional problem beside the others.