Chapter Seven

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Kongpob had been lost in his melancholy since Saturday night. Thankfully he didn't have to fake a smile for Achara for the rest of the weekend since she was staying with her parents. She'd called several times, but he told her he was swamped with work and didn't have time to talk. He couldn't bring himself to pretend. It was just too much for him right now. His mind kept landing on Arthit. Thinking about him made his heart sing. Just the thought of him brightened his day. He had been beating himself up repeatedly.

Why did Auntie have to spoil his time with Arthit? He saw the look on Arthit's face when he left the café. He must be confused. Angry. Betrayed. Kongpob was worried. Was he okay? They had such a wonderful time together. Kongpob literally couldn't remember the last time he had felt so free...so unencumbered. Arthit expected nothing from him. He was free to be himself and he relished the time he spent with him. Arthit was a good person who had been horribly betrayed by almost everyone he trusted. And now, he was just another person to disappoint him.

He had to make it up to him. He couldn't let Arthit go and he wanted to make sure he was okay. He stood from his desk and opened his door to find Phana Kongthanin, his best friend, standing at his office door.

"Phana! What are you doing here?"

"Marena wasn't at her desk, so I was just about to knock. Busy? Thought we could catch up." Phana held up two cups of coffee and wiggled his eyebrows.

"I was just about to do something, but I guess it can wait. Come on in."

Kongpob plopped down in his couch, inviting Phana to join him.

"So! Mom called and said she saw you on Saturday."

"Oh, did she?" Kongpob took a sip of the coffee and avoided Phana's heavy stare.

"Yeah, she did. So...you wanna tell me what you were doing there with one of your patients?" Phana put his coffee down and crossed his legs, crossing him arms and glaring at Kongpob.

"He's not my patient anymore. I transferred him to Kit."

"Dammit Kongpob! You know what I mean. Do I even need to say it?"

"What do you want me to say Pha? It wasn't on purpose. I ran into him at the Orchid Expo and we were just having a quick bite afterwards. I didn't do anything wrong."

"Yet."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Oh please! We both know you don't really want to marry Achara. If you weren't such a filial son, you wouldn't even be in this mess. Why can't you just tell your mother that you don't love Achara and don't want to get married?"

"That's the problem, Pha. I do love her, but just not that way. If I didn't love her, I would've just walked off and ended it. She loves me so much. How can I tear her heart out like that? She's loved me forever and she has been nothing but wonderful. At first, I thought we could turn a warm friendship into something more, but after awhile it just wasn't enough for me. It's killing me inside and I'm starting to resent her. That's the last thing I want."

"Kong, if you don't talk to her now. It's only going to get worse. So what? You're going to keep quiet, say nothing and slowly die inside until you die for real? That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. If you can't be what she needs, then let her be free to be with someone who can."

Kongpob leaned forward and held his head with his hands. Phana could see the tears through Kongpob's fingers. Phana rubbed Kongpob's back. He hurt for his friend, but he also hurt for Achara. He was there when she first confessed to him and has been there ever since. Kongpob was a fiercely loyal person and a good son. He had a bit of a hero complex and never wanted to let anyone down. It was the primary reason he became a psychiatrist. He always wanted to help everyone and make them feel better, even when it cost him his own happiness. This time, however, it might just cost him everything.

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