P O S T E D ✓

Epilogue

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There was something different about me.

I don't know exactly what had changed, or when it had happened, but along the way something inside me metamorphosed. That term insinuates a good change, a beautiful change into a new state of being. Maybe what had happened to me hadn't been so drastic or great.

It probably depends on who you asked.

For me though, when I looked in the mirror I wasn't so plain. I wasn't so average to my own eyes anymore and I realized that I might not have ever been that way. It had been my mindset, the people around me, and circumstance that had made me invisible not to other people, but to myself.

And one thing I have learned is that if you can't see yourself, if you don't want other people to see you. Then they won't.

Issac's videos were an inspiration. They gave me motivation to change. Not just outwardly either. Sure it may seem to an outsider that some straight hair and pushed-down socks caught people's eye. That would paint them in a shallow light. Harrison wasn't the only person who saw me after that moment. Issac saw me, Liana saw me, Penny saw me. Even Sarah saw me for the new person I was becoming.

But I don't think it was just the surface, superficial improvements that caused them to see me. It was that I believed I could be seen.

Okay lets put it this way. In middle school there the world thought swine flu was going to wipe out the human population. I had no reason to doubt it and I was even more of an over thinker than I am now. I know, hard to believe right?

Anyway, I gushed to my mom about it. I told her every time I sneezed and asked if my eyes looked red. I felt nauseas anytime I heard the term "Swine Flu". No amount of reassurance could stop me from believing I had the chance of catching it and dying. My nails were chewed down to the bone. One night my mom had Gabe sit me down. He told me that he had talked to the doctors and the hospital he worked at and convinced them to give him some of the highly elite preventative pills for the disease.

Of course there was no such thing. They were sugar pills. A placebo. But the point is, I believed that they would help me and so they did.

Basically, I believed that Issac's tips would work. I thought people would notice and that made me open to more interactions. It gave me more confidence even if I hadn't realized it at the time. And people see confidence. High school lives and breaths off of confidence.

I'd gone through a lot these past few months and I still had a few to go before senior year was over. I'd had my heart broken and I'd broken a few myself. I'd made new friends that I'd never have considered before. I'd fallen out of love and fallen into it.

The point is I wasn't the same Montana Montgomery that walked into this high school in September. I could either look at that as a good thing or a bad thing. I chose to see it in a brighter cast of light.

I saw him at the end of the corridor. He was by the water fountains talking to Sutton and Christina. That had come as a shock to me. Christina had been the hardest to crack for me than anyone else in the group. If I was honest I still really didn't know her that well. At this point I knew John better. Yet, she had been spending a lot of time with Sutton since the Snow Ball a few weeks ago.

Still, maybe it wasn't surprising. Sutton could dive into any person with his words and eyes.

It wasn't Sutton or Christina that had my attention though. It was the boy with dark hair and forest eyes that was talking to them. I hadn't seen him over break. Not since the car ride he told he'd wait for me.