Mesperyian

Memories

     Kevin and I have been training for months and in a way he has helped me open up. I have told him everything I've been through and everything I did and he didnt flinch, he didnt push me away, he made me feel ok with my decision. I'm currently sitting at the gym while he gets us some water and I cant help but think how much he has helped me overcome my nightmare. I hear the door open and see him make his way towards me with that freakishly sexy smile on his face making my heart spead up. I dont know why he's helping me, I dont understand why I'm here but that smile. That gloriously sexy smile keeps me routed, makes me want to be here stay close. I need to make sure he stays safe because he made sure I was safe, he made sure I got better and in some way I need to pay him back.

Even if it kills me everytime he goes home with some one else, even if a piece of me breaks everytime he talks to me about someone else. In the end I'm as close to happiness as I'll ever get.

"Here you go." I reach out to grab the bottle and our fingers brush my breath hitched but he didnt give any sing of being affected.

"Thanks"

"No problem, how are you feeling?"

"Better I guess, thanks for the help."

"No need to thank me, listen I'm gonna go out for a drink today want to come with me? It'll be good for you to go out and I promise to make it worth your time." He smirks at me but i shake my head I'm not ready for that I'm not ready to be around other people. It's hard enough being here around all these guys, but I've been handling it thanks to him, Kevin has been by my side since the moment I knocked on his door. I was originally here to get a job. But he saw how damaged I was, he saw how hurt and lonely I felt and for what ever reason decided to help me. Lana wanted to come with me but I told her it wasnt safe there is one other guy out there that was part of it all and until i find him i wont allow her to be at risk. The further she is from me the better, that way she wont be tied to me in anyway. Kevin reached his hands out to help me up, back to training it is. I didnt want to train at first, didnt think I would need it but then he convinced me it was a healthy way of letting go of pent up feeling.

It started up that way I swear very innocently only training but weeks went by and I couldn't help but notice the way his muscles constricted when he took his fighting stance the way his face took a menacing look, and the way my body reacted to his being around, on top, behind and anywhere near me. The way his breath hit my neck or the way his hands devoured my body when he helped me fix my stance. God his eyes would wonder every now and then but other then that I didnt see any sings of him being intrested. I would work out every day just to be able to feel him against me, I was jerked out of my though with my body slamming against the floor.

"Focuse!" Kevin yelled bringing my atencion to him. "What the fuck are you thinking, you looked weak, you had your defences down I could have killed you in so many difrent ways."

Well that means you could have gotten closer and chose not to. I would have loved to have his body over mine.

"We've been here all day, what do you expect?"

"For you to focuse, you never know when the fight will end you just know you have to keep fighting no mater how hard you try!" I'm getting tired of his tone, he knows I don't enjoy being yeld at I got up and angrily took my position again in no time there were punches and kicks being thrown, I used his torso to push my body over his head locked my leg around his neck and dropped us to the floor tugging one hand under his chin and the oder in his hair, his smooth dark hair, he tapped the mat after trying to get free for a couple of seconds making me release him.

"Damn, Mesperyian, that's what I'm gonna call you."

"Mes what? And why?" I asked breathlessly as we both layed side by side on the floor catching our breaths.

"Mesperyian you know Hades and Persophone daughter, created by Hades who Invisioned her after Persophine left for 5 months. He missed her so much he started to imagine what it would be like to have a child with her and named her Mesperyian she was so beautiful he found himself talking about her to everyone and word got to Aphrodite who got jealous of her beauty and attacked her by burning her face wich turn Mesperyian into the Goddes of Punishment and torture. Its said that after being burned by Aphrodite she grew wings, claws and made a helmet to cover her scars and now searches for those who deceive and lie to torture and punish them." By now he had turn on his side and was looking at me while talking his head resting on his hand perched by his elbow on the mat and although I heard everything he said I was focused on the way his lips moved on the way his eyes light up with amusement while telling the story or the summery of it. When he was done he smiled at me and took my breath away if I would have been standing I know I wouldn't have been able to stay up because that smile was the cause to so many sexy dreams. And damn was I in heaven right now.

"So you're saying I'm a mad anti Goddes who punishes people for there wrong doings? After being brought to live by someone who missed another women?" I asked while raising my eyebrows at him. He chuckled a little and then went back to looking at the ceiling.

"No I'm saying you were meant to be perfect you were created to be loved and cared for but were wronged by someone who felt threatened by said perfection and are now instead mad and hurt filled with sympathy and pride going around willing to fight for those who can't fight for themself. So even though you were hurt, even though you were wronged you got up you morphed into something new, something that reflected more than you already were. You are in every sence of the statement perfectly imperfect and that makes you yet again the most beautiful creature to roam this earth and that right there will always bring you pain so let's get back to work." He said and got up as if he hadn't just made my heart skip a couple of beats as if he hadn't made my body react in indescribable ways and made me stop breathing. In that sentence he took all of me, he claimed my soul and walked away with it leaving me feeling empty but full all in one and that made me want him even more.

I knew he had been hurt before and I know he didn't want to go back and feel whatever he felt back then. But I didnt care I wanted to be selfish I wanted to walk up to him and kiss him sensle and I wanted him to know that he to was perfect in my eyes and some day I would but right now we had to work on ourselves we had to get ourselves to where we felt comfortable to be able to accept ourselves and that's what im gonna work on everyday so that when I am ready to be his he can too be ready to be mine hopefully then he can see that I was listening this whole time.

That he wasnt alone, that I would hold him up when he couldn't. I got up and stood infront of him, his eyes held a mixture of pain and longing. His body was stiff and showed no sing of this emotions but I knew better. It's just been me and him in this room for months I knew what he was feeling I knew what he was thinking and that's why we were here that's why we kicked, punched, pushed, and screamed because our scars run deep and have yet to heal but we were going to do what ever it took to heal as much as we could.

He might not ever want me the way I want him but I will always be there for him no judgement no questions. He kills, I bury. He falls, I pick him up. He hurts, I clean him up heal his wounds and get him going again. Because that's what his doing for me and i will for ever be thankful.

With that in mind I take my stance and for the next couple of months focuse only on this, on us, on healing hoping that one day we can find in each other what is needed.

And here's a little of her past!

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Until next time!