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"He was still trying to get my clothes off so I sticked my finger in his knife wound. He let me go and I made a run for it. He recovered and grabbed a hold of my hair and land a fist in my face and threw me down on the floor roughly. He then repeatedly smashed my head in the floor. I tried to get away but he pulled me back. I kicked him in the same wound and tried to get away. He land a fist in my face again causing me to become dizzy."

"He got on top of me and that's when I got ahold of the knife and stabbed him repeatedly until he was dead." I finished my story and the court room was so quiet you could hear everyone breathing and their heart beat. I looked into the eyes of the people in the court room and they had tears in their eyes except for my dead step dad family. They looked angry.

I was fear to take back my seat at the defendant table. I watched everything around me. Everyone talking. The air was buzzing and at the end of the day I was proven innocent. I wasn't charge or anything. The verdict. It was self defense.

It still didn't made me happy I was still broken despite being proven innocent. I didn't gain anything. I just told my story of living with my abusive and rapist step dad. Now all I got was my face and name in the newspaper and on the TV. Now when people look at me all they look at me with is pity and sympathy. All I could here is it's that girl. You know the one on TV that her step dad abused and raped.

I was sent to counseling and support groups. The lawyer didn't leave my side she was determined to help me get better. I was staying with her because I had no family members. She helped me with school since it was okay after a month for me to go. I could hear all of them whispering in the hallways and in class. It bothered me that I have to be reminded of it everyday I went to school.

I never saw the Smith's again. The called me a whore and other names how I seduced their son and killed him. They put out a restraining order on the Smith's and i was glad that I don't have to see his family again. I would feel guilty that I have taken their son away from them but I didn't regret killing him because he took alot away from me too.

It took a year for me to smile for me to talk to anyone. I went to college and just like high school it was the same treatment. I thought people would forget about it after a year but i guess they didn't.

The lawyer Ms Simmons became my guardian until I turned 18 but I would visit her now and then to tell her that i am okay. I told her i wanted to change my name and state. She agreed and she helped me change my identity and state. I didn't know that it wad going to be hard to leave her and i didn't know that i got so attached to her until I was leaving.

When I moved away I wasn't started at pity or sympathy or that girl who was abused and raped but has a new person. I rented an apartment and I got a job. The job paid well and I moved out of the apartment and got a small house for myself. I could pay the bills on my pay check so it wasn't a hassle and plus i loved the house than the apartment. I don't have loud neighbours with then walls and it was a nice neighborhood to live in. I settled in nicely. I got to meet the neighbors in the neighborhood.

I met this after a month of staying there and we became best of friends. It was 9 months after I told her who I truly was because I trusted her that much. It was 6 months after I met Joshua and because that's what everyone called him i called him Josh.

It took awhile before I could be open and comfortable with him. It was in Christmas under a misseol toe i had my first kiss. It was the best kiss i have ever had. We only kissed i was afriad of going further than that with him seeing what i went through. It was when we were officially dating I tried to take that step with him. I was a little stiff and tense about it but he helped me relaxed.

"Rosie you can relax I'm not going to hurt you are anything." He said smiling and I was lost in his who teeth that always dazzle my eyes.

"Okay." I said trying to get the tension out of my body.

"Rosie are you a virgin? Maybe we shouldn't do this until your ready. I can see that you are scared and i don't want to pressure you into doing something you don't want to do." He said getting up but I pulled him back.

"Josh I'm not a virgin. I just haven't done this in a long time and yes am scared but I think you can help me with that." I told him. "Kiss me." I said bringing my lips closer to his. He didn't waste no time to kiss me. He kissed me and I could feel all that feeling when he kissed me all that electricity and the butterflies in my stomach.

His warms hands explore my body and i relax into his arms. He slowly lay me down on my back after his hands found the way to the back and unhook my bra. He slowly pulled it down my arms. He calmed my mouth again his naked chest pressing on my breast. A shiver ran down my spine and goosebumps litter my skin and I wasn't cold at all. He kissed down my body and to my stomach. He pulled down the last of my clothes. I tried giving myself from his eyes but he stopped me.

"You don't need to cover up you're body from me. Rosie you're beautiful, your body is beautiful and i want you to know that so don't hide from me." He said slowly removing my hands and kissing them.

His mouth claim one of my nipples while his hand work the other one. My back arched off of the bed when his warm mouth sucked on my breast. This was different and i could feel down below getting moist like it has never before. He then switch with the breast. I sound left my lips that was foreign to me when he cupped me below.

He groaned. "You're so wet and ready for me but for your first time with me I'm going to take it slow and make love to you." I could only moaned when he rubbed that sensitive bud. I didn't tense when I feel one of his finger enter me. He started moving it in snd out of me until I became undone.

I can't believe I had my first orgasm on Josh's finger. He kissed me and I felt something probing at my entrance. I tense involuntarily. He lift up his head and looked me into my eyes when he felt me tense.

"Just relax Rosie I'm not going to hurt. I'll give you time to adjust okay." He said soothing me. I relaxed underneath him. He entered me slowly snd it didn't hurt like I thought it would but i hissed a little when all of him was finally inside of my vagina. "You okay?" I swallowed and nodded. He's a little bigger than I have expected.

He moved in and out of my slowly and i enjoyed the feeling that he was giving me. I never thought that having sex felt this good but i wanted him to go faster. "Please Josh." I begged using my foot to show him what i want. He kissed me on my lips.

"Patient Rosie I'll fuck you after this don't worry." He promised i thought I got wetter when he said that to me. He grinned.

He did fuck me that night and when I asked him fot more he gave it to me like how I asked for it. I was afriad that i was going to experience all pain but all I felt was pleasure.

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