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i rlly don't know what to write... i started this story on a limb thinking it'd be cool to have an underage stripper thing. honestly, i have no fucking clue as to y i thought this would be a good story. like, i didn't even think of an actual storyline, but i guess it's going well i mean, we're almost at fucking 2k and i'm number 2?!?! in boris pavlikovsky?!?! well thank u bitches, now read :)

i also like this song a lot and it somewhat fits so i suggest u listen.
NOW read. lmao :)




















 lilian was always a good girl and it showed most when she was around people younger than her or much older than her

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lilian was always a good girl and it showed most when she was around people younger than her or much older than her. she felt pity for those who are young because of their lack of knowledge of what is really going on in the world. she felt pity on the elders because we ruined their world—the world they grew up in— and ruined the society too. they raised their children right but society took a toll on that and ruined, destroyed, the children they loved so dearly.

lilian felt pity on animals too. she felt as if we didn't deserve the world because all we ever did was demolish, tear down, impair, and flaw this world that once was beautiful. she felt as if the world would do so much better without any humans, or maybe if humans were perfect, just maybe, the world would possibly survive and stay continually gorgeous. animals have done nothing but simply live their lives eating, sleeping, and playing. they deserved better. lilian sometimes imagined what would happen if suddenly humans went extinct. would the world get better? would the animals survive? would the world cease to exist? or would maybe the animals grow aware and conscience and injure the world as well, but in their own way? she always wondered. she wondered as she walked home from the grocery store. her father was far too lazy to drive himself down there and get the few things he needed so he always sent his gullible daughter. more forced than sent in most cases. she didn't hate going to the grocery store though. she actually quite enjoyed it. she could escape from her father and sappy home. sometimes she even met up with her one friend. her name was noel. she was sweet with a short blonde bob, pale skin, long eyelashes, and the sweet voice of an angel. lilian was secretly in love with her. noel was a church girl though, and lilian knew. lilian knew that noel would never love her back because she was overwhelmingly religious and seemed to follow every rule that was told. one of those rules being against gays. lilian thought it was unfair. she thought it was messed up how someone could decide who they get to love and who they get to marry when love is love. she loved noel so dearly that she cried herself to sleep most nights with her on her mind. she always thought of how far they would've gone if noel didn't follow the rules always, or if she didn't get on that bus that night.

lilian was on one of her trips to the grocery store when she got the call. her phone rang for a few seconds as she brought out her phone from her cargo jean pocket. it was noel. or so she thought. lilian pressed the green button smiling. the voice on the other end wasn't noel's. it was noel's mother.

"hello? is this lilian?" the voice broke once, but continued.

"yes. is this noel's mother?" she replied confused as to why the voice wasn't her friend's.

"yes, yes it is. i was calling to tell you of some news we heard just now, maybe a few minutes ago. uhm... lilian?-" she was cut off somewhat by the eager girl.

"yes? i'm still here. just please, what happened to noel?"

"last night, noel was getting onto the bus she normally takes to get home from work. an-and and there, there was this man on the bus who wasn't a normal man. he was a-a monster. he raped young girls an-and noel didn't know. he had murdered the driver, and took the bus, and drove it to th-," lilian was already tearing up and tearing apart with the words that left her mouth muffled by the speaker.

"fuck the rest of the story! what happened to noel?!" her words were filled with sadness and guilt.

"lilian," there was a pause before she continued. lilian could hear her sniffle. "noel was raped and murdered along with two other girls that were on the bus," she spoke so quietly that lilian could barely hear, but she did. she heard every heartbreaking word that came from her mouth.

lilian dropped her phone along with her body. she fell to her knees and covered her face with her hands, drenching them with her salty tears. she had never felt so much pain in her life. it hurt so badly, she could barely breath, she was sobbing so much. lilian didn't go home that night. she slept on the cold grass, near the grocery store where she was meant to go before her phone rang. she hadn't moved from her spot on the ground until she fell asleep with tear stained cheeks and red, puffy eyes.

lilian woke the next morning with an elderly woman hovering over her with a concerned look in her eyes. the old lady helped her talk through what had happened and supported her. lilian had caught her name, it was jill. the name stuck with her like honey on a stick. the lady was like the grandmother she never had and she cherished that.

she never forgot those two days, and though it happened a year ago it still affected her badly. she imagined what would have happened if she told her how she felt, how she was in love with her,... but she never had, and she regretted that so very much.

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