Moonlight | Kim Taehyung

41: Luna

Taehyung's parents have headed back home and my mum and sisters are asleep in their rooms, whilst Taehyung and I are cuddling up in bed watching Netflix on my laptop. I lay my head on his chest as he strokes my hair gently. I'm not paying much attention to the movie playing in front of us, as I just stare into space thinking and enjoying being close to Taehyung. I feel lighter when I'm with him and I feel happier; I don't need to feel stressed out or worry about anything because I'm not afraid to show him who I am, so there are no secrets between us.

I'm envisioning having a joyful future with Taehyung; we would live in an average-sized home and we would live a simple life with a daughter or son. I would have a music career and Taehyung would finally open up his own cafe, whilst our children are at school and I would allow them to do things they are passionate about. We would love them and cherish them for who they are. I would do the housework and cook meals, then I would sing and play music to our children, and Taehyung would tell them stories before bed. That's the kind of future I would like; a peaceful and blissful life filled with love.

I sigh as I nuzzle closer to Taehyung, which makes his chuckle and say, "You aren't paying attention to the movie are you?"

I shut off my laptop and push it aside as I lay down in bed and Taehyung does the same. Our noses are almost touching as we lay in bed facing each other.

"That movie wasn't really interesting and I'm a little tired," I state. "It's quite late, so stay with me for the night?"

"Okay." He embraces me and mutters, as I close my eyes and he then kisses the top of my head. "Goodnight. I love you."

"I love you too," I murmur, before allowing myself to drift off to sleep in Taehyung's arms.

---

Morning soon comes and I wake up to the dazzling sun in my face and Taehyung is no longer beside me. I stretch my arms and yawn as I get off my bed and trudge to the dining room. I breathe in the smell of scrambled eggs and sausages that Mina is cooking in the kitchen and spot Taehyung sitting in the living room with mum and Rae-na. I walk over towards them and Taehyung offers me to sit on his lap, so I do and he wraps his arms tightly around me.

I notice that my mum has a photo album in her hands and realise that she's showing pictures of my childhood to Taehyung. These photos were taken before my parents started quarrelling, they were all photos of my happy childhood; snapshots of us having fun as a family where everyone is beaming.

"You look so adorable as a little girl," Taehyung says, which makes me blush and mum giggles as she points at the photos of me.

I lean against him and mutter as I look at the photos that evoke nostalgic memories in my mind, "I miss my childhood days... I miss dad..."

"I miss daddy too..." Rae-na's smile turns upside down and says, which makes mum gulp. "Will he ever come back to us, mummy?"

Mum sighs and closes the photo album, then places it onto the coffee table.

She smiles sadly and says to her, "I don't know sweetie... I miss him too..."

I hold onto my mum's hand as I notice tears start to brim in her eyes, and say gently, "Mum... don't be upset, maybe it's best that he doesn't come back... he gave us all a hard time."

"I know..." she replies sorrowfully. "I miss the time when he was kind and loving. I miss the man I first fell in love with and married."

I squeeze her hand and answer, "We just have to keep moving on in life. Even though I know that's really hard, we still have to. It's for the best."

Mum nods her head and brushes away her tears, yet Rae-na begins to whimper softly, so mum holds onto her and calms her. Taehyung's grip around my waist tightens too and I look up at him and smile.

"If I can manage to move on from Haneul, you can move on from your dad too," he whispers and I nod my head slowly.

I keep telling him to move on, so it's only fair that I listen to my own advice and move on from my dad and my childhood. I should listen to myself and focus only on the present. I should live my life as it is and not dwell on whatever happened in the past. I give advice to people that I don't even follow, but I'm going to change that now and I'm going to follow my own advice. I'm going to move on from my past and I'm going to learn to forgive the people that have treated me badly. I'm going to give them a second chance.

I've come to the decision to forgive Aurora and I'm going to completely forget about Hera. I will no longer allow Hera's nasty words get to me and I'm not going to doubt Taehyung's feelings for me just because of what she said.

I'm going to live my life the way I want. I'm going to love my mum and sisters, and I'm going to love Taehyung. I'm going to strive for a euphoric future and have healthy relationships with the people around me. I promise that I will never again harm myself, which in turn hurts the people who care about me. I will love myself, and I will love everyone who loves me.

"Breakfast is ready," Mina suddenly calls out as she takes out the plates of scrambled eggs and sausages from the kitchen and places them on the dining table.

Rae-na giddily races over to the table and excitedly takes a seat as she squeals delightedly, "They smell so good, I can't wait to take a big bite."

We laugh at her as we take our seats and we dig into our breakfast. Rae-na eats her sausages with a huge smile plastered on her face, so I take a bite of the sausage on my plate, and indeed it is delicious. The amount of juiciness and crunchiness it has is perfect. The inside is warm and savoury, whilst the skin is crunchy and has just the right amount of seasoning.

"Mm..." Rae-na says as her eyes sparkle. "This is really tasty. You might even be a better cook than Luna now."

"Hey!" I say and frown.

"How does it feel now that I'm the better cook and Rae-na is complimenting me instead of you, Luna?" Mina flicks her hair back confidently as she says gladly, which makes me roll my eyes and scoff as mum and Taehyung giggle at our childishness.

"At least there's one thing that you're never going to be better than me at," I say. "And that's music."

"True..." my sister replies.

I notice that mum is smiling at us, then she glances at Taehyung who smiles back at her.

"What?" I whisper and ask Taehyung.

"Nothing," he replies with a grin still plastered on his face. "I'm just glad that you're playfully bickering with your sister and loosening up."

I too am glad that I'm able to unwind and just feel so care-free with my family, without feeling so awkward and nervous around them. I suppose the couple of weekends we spent together this month has really helped me to relax and has brought our relationship closer together. My mind is clear and I no longer feel burdened or afraid of opening up to my family. I finally feel like I belong again, really belong. This feeling of bliss it different from the times before. I feel safe. I feel carefree. I feel exhilarated. And most important of all, I feel loved and cared for.