Owning You - A Na Jaemin Fanfic

26. I'm Glad

I stroll with him under the glittering dark purple sky, the headlights of faraway cars illuminating the rows of poplar trees lining the road.

We are at a park.

We walk along the meandering path that snakes between shadowed green grass on each side, a stream to our left.

"So, you and Carol - are you still friends?" I don't even know why I'm asking him about her. Maybe, I'm a sucker for punishment.

He sighs. "No." He stares into the night. "I can't blame her for being mad. I hurt her."

"What did you like about her?" Stop, already, Kim Haeri. You're just going to hurt yourself more.

"Well," he gives me a crooked little smile. "She's a very affectionate person. Very...demonstrative, if you get my drift." Is that laughter I hear in his voice? "And she was always baking stuff. Cupcakes, cookies, brownies...she made pumpkin pie for Halloween and gingerbread cookies for Christmas. They were delicious." I kick at some twigs savagely. "And she volunteers at orphanages when she's free. She's a very caring person."

"What an angel," I say frostily. "Maybe she'll bake you a log cake for Christmas. For old time's sake."

I hear him laughing, and brush past him. I am seething with jealousy and rage.

"Does talking about Carol upset you?" He stares at me for a beat. I smile sickly at him.

"Oh, no. Absolutely not. I can't wait to hear more." My anger is a rabid beast with spikes and yard-long tusks. Good thing Carol is not here.

"Really?" he says softly, his eyes studying me lazily. "Well...let me see. What else can I tell you about her?" He smiles at me sweetly. "She baked me a chocolate heartcake for Valentine's Day." He beams at me. "It was amazing. You would have loved it. You love chocolate, don't you?"

"I used to," I say coldly. I may even have gnashed my teeth. He smirks.

I stomp ahead, my heels crunching the dead leaves underfoot. I fall into a sullen silence, and plod on sulkily, him trailing behind me.

It hurts, a sharp pinch somewhere deep in my chest, knowing that they had history together, that she baked cakes and cookies for him, that they spent Valentine's Day and Christmas together.

Since meeting him, every morning I have woken up with a sweet, wrenching pain in my heart, the joy and overwhelming terror of first love budding in my heart.

And it hits me like a mallet to the temple, the realization that I am too far gone now to ever be the cool, aloof girl that I once was; I am so in love with him. Stupidly, dreadfully in love with him. Overnight, I have become a fool. Overnight, I have become weak, because I love him.

The grass is heavy with dew. I walk slowly, watching the lamplights dancing off the silvery bark of the trees. The air is soft and cool, and there is a kiss of rain in the breeze. I hear the low chatter of the stream, and the rhythmic croak of a toad.

Jaemin has caught up with me.

"Haeri," he says softly, his eyes glinting with mischief. "Are you jealous?"

He smiles at me wickedly, and my heart flutters, and I feel tiny and foolish, and out of my depth, a girl just learning her words.

"Me, jealous?" I say nastily. "I don't have a jealous bone in my body. Go on. Do tell me more. How many dolphins has she saved?"

"Ah, how magnanimous." His voice is mocking. "Other girls would have slapped my face by now. But you're not like other girls, are you, Haeri?"

"We were talking about your ex. Not me." I smile syrupy-sweetly at him. I'm sick and tired of him waxing lyrical about that spineless creature. Time to switch his attention back to me. I half-pout, and indulge in a little hair-tossing drama and fix limpid eyes on him. I look adorable, I know. I've practised this exact look in my mirror a million times. It never fails to work.