Owning You - A Na Jaemin Fanfic

55. A New Beginning

The start of a new term.

Everything is the same, yet different.

I wake up to the alarm ringing, but Jaemin's already left the bedroom. There's a dent in the bed where he lay last night, spooned against my back.

I shower, and change into my school uniform, and stare at myself in the mirror. The thin, pale girl stares back at me. The same, yet different. There's a hickey on my neck. My eyes are veiled, filled with a secret knowledge, and I think, to my surprise, that I look almost...happy?

He's munching on a sandwich as I walk into the kitchen, and plonk myself down on a high stool at the island.

"Morning," he says, smiling faintly. He is bathed in early morning light, slanting its way in through the glass panes, his hair a shimmer of gold. He looks bright and alert. He must be one of those disgusting morning people who jump out of bed at the crack of dawn.

"Morning. You're up early." I yawn. "God, I hate waking up early."

"Eat up," he orders. "You don't want to be late for your new term."

"I don't feel hungry. Can I skip breakfast?" I eye the cheese sandwich, my mouth turned down.

"No," he says. "Eat up." He pushes a mug of steaming coffee toward me.

He watches me like a hawk as I chew grumpily on my cheese sandwich.

"Can I not eat the cheese?"

"No. Eat." He frowns. "Is that why you're so skinny? You don't eat breakfast?"

"I do. Just...I hate eating breakfast early."

"Get used to it. You're a high school student."

"A married high school student." I giggle. "Do your friends know?"

"Some do. Some don't."

"Are you going to tell them?"

"Nah. You'll be my dirty little secret." The way he says it makes me blush, and I almost choke on my coffee. But it kind of hurts that he doesn't want people to know that he's married. To me.

"Are you going to tell your friends?" His eyes are fixed on me with an odd, wary look I have not seen on his face before. Like he wants to know my answer. Does he want me to tell them? Or doesn't he? Would he be shocked if I say, Yes. I want to tell them. I want everyone to know. I don't want to be hidden. I don't want to be your dirty little secret. I want to shout from the rooftops that you are mine. My husband.

"I only have one friend. Suzy." I say - nonchalantly, I hope. "Oh, and Namju. And they know."

"Stay away from that fucker." He is scowling.

"Are you jealous?" He scowls harder.

"I mean it. Stay away from him." He leans across the island suddenly, and kisses me hard. "You're mine. Okay?"

"Okay," I say, a little breathlessly. Jealous Jaemin is so hot.

The limo drops us off at school, and we walk in together, our shoes squishing softly over the damp concrete. He's holding my hand, swinging it idly, so that it slaps against his hard thigh, back, forth, back, forth, as we walk.

The beautiful girls are there, milling around near the entrance, as usual.

"That's where I saw you." I look up at him. "The first time I looked at you."

He frowns down at me. He doesn't say a word.

"I looked at you because my parents had told me the night before. That we were engaged. I came in to school the next morning, and you were standing there with a bunch of girls, and smiling. And then you turned, and you looked at me, and I - froze." My voice trailed off. "I stood there, and froze. I didn't know what I was expecting - anger, maybe. Or a nod. I wanted something, some kind of acknowledgement, I guess. But the thing is," I say wistfully, "You just...looked away. Like I didn't matter. Like you didn't care enough for me to feel anything. And, somehow, that hurt more than anything...that you were just - indifferent." I give a little laugh. "Silly, isn't it?"