Family problems- a TVD fanfic

I Havent Been Here In A Thousand Years

I lash out at the bourbon decanter sitting on the side, infuriated at Damon’s refusal to listen to my explanation. Though I thought I barely touched it, the decanter flies across the room and smashes into pieces, the dark liquid running down the wall. My eyes fill with tears and I rub them furiously. As I stand looking at the fire, my mind reeling at how everything had went from being so perfect, to this. The man I love upstairs, upset because of me, because of my selfish choices and decisions. I only just got him back and I push him away after only a few days. The self-loathing I have had to live with for decades now fills me, and though this is far from one of the worst things I’ve ever done, it seems to affect me worse than anything. It bubbles in my stomach, threatening to overspill and take over. A tear spills over my cheek and I wipe it away quickly. I take a deep breath and unable to stand the deathly silence coming from upstairs I turn and run out the door. I have no idea what is in this area now, but I remember going somewhere as a child. I head in that direction hanging on to the slim hope that after a thousand years it’s still there.

I get there in­­­­­­ what must only a few minutes, but feels like an age. I’m in shock as I gaze at the small peak looking over the large quarry, almost completely hidden by the thick of trees surrounding it. Of course these trees were barely saplings when I was a child, we lived just over the water, I came here to play, where my mother and father could still see me, but not hear me and I could play in peace. I sit at the edge of the quarry; the drop is a lot larger than it was before, almost 10 foot down now to a minuscule patch of sand that I remember to be a lot larger. Although, those baby trees are now enormous, twisted monsters creating sinister shadows over the forest area, the peak has become taller and the beach almost non-existent now, I still get the same sense of calm and relief I did as a child. I came here to escape, to get away as well as play. I’m the baby along with my twin brother Kol. It used to scare me when my brothers fought with each other; it was almost unbearable when they fought with our father. This was my escape. I could watch from a distance, make sure that someone intervened but I didn’t have to hear them threaten and ridicule and hate. I couldn’t stand it. They never got on. There was never a moments rest or peace. It was a constant never ending battle of which I grew bored of almost instantly.

I let my legs dangle over the edge of the peak and stare out at the water. My eyes prick with tears and I rub them again, but this time it doesn’t work. I scowl and pull off my shoes. Stiffly, I stand up and take a few steps back, before running and launching myself off the peak into the icy water below. I brush the bottom as it is dangerously shallow for diving here, but I swim out as far as I can as quickly as I can. After only a few seconds I rise to the surface, to find myself in the centre of the large quarry.

I swim for what must be hours before returning to the peak and retrieving my shoes. I think about where to go, unsure of whether returning to the boarding house now is a good idea or not. I decide that it’s now or never, knowing that I’ll just keep putting it off. I head off in the direction that I came in.