Best for Us (GU #3)

forty-seven

Forty-Seven: Vanessa Gerleen

TYLER was thunderstruck.

Iyon lang ang naisip kong salita nang makitang hindi siya agad nakaimik at tulalang nakatingin lang sa akin. Ngunit mabilis lang din iyon at awtomaktikong bumalik na ang kaswal na ngiti sa kanyang labi.

"Why?"

Napaangat ang kilay ko roon. He's really asking me that?

Kunot-noo kong binalik ang tanong sa kanya. "Why not? Nag-sleep over naman na tayo dati ah."

He chuckled but there was no humor in it. Nerves pa nga ang mas mahihimigan doon. And wait a minute, he's feeling anxious about this?

"Yung dati, that's a different situation," he said. "Then, there was an emergency.. And this time, well, it's...it's..."

Hindi ko na napigilan pa ang ngiti ko roon. It was obvious now. He's really fretting over this.

"It's normal," tapos ko sa sinasabi niya. "This is what couples do, right? They sleep together."

Napaubo si Tyler saka nag-iwas ng tingin. Napakagat ako ng labi. Ang sarap niya pa sanang asarin but I'm feeling sleepy already. Must be the meds I took. Kaya dapat ay matapos na 'tong usapan namin. Though, I would be heartbroken if he'll reject the favor that I'm asking, I will understand.

"You know I mean literally, right?" paglilinaw ko kay Tyler. "And you're not thinking I will take advantage of you, aren't you? Like I know, two years ago, I kind of insinuated something else, but this time, promise no funny business."

Tyler laughed once more; half amused and still half nervous.

"Shoudn't I be the one telling you that right now? I should be the one reassuring you that if we're going to sleep together in one bed, you're safe with me," sambit niya saka inabot ang pareho kong kamay. Agad kong nadama ang bahagyang panginginig ng kamay niya. "Ako dapat ang gumagawa n'un. But you can see I am shaking right now. I am suddenly nervous of the idea that we will be sharing a bed together. It's not like this is the first time we'll be doing this. But I'm hella nervous," he breathed unsteadily, laughed coyly. "Seryoso. Dama mo naman diba sa kamay ko?"

Maliit akong natawa saka tumango ng dalawang boses.

"You know why? Because I'm afraid I won't be able to control myself. What if I do something that's disrespectful to you."

I looked at him tenderly. Oh how much I adore this guy. I raised our joined hands. I moved it close to my lips then I paced a soft kiss on his knuckles. "I understand," tugon ko. "It's just that a lot has happened today that's not part of our plan and I thought spending the night together will comfort us both somehow. But, I get you. Hindi lang din halata but if you would listen to my heartbeat, I'm tensed as heck too."

Napabuga ng malalim na hininga si Tyler. Marahan niyang binitawan ang kamay ko bago ako hinawakan sa magkabilang pisngi saka hinagkan ako sa noo. At pagkatapos ay ubod lapad na ngumiti.

Walang nagsasalita sa aming dalawa ni Tyler at naisip ko na baka nga hindi magandang ideya na hingiin sa kanya ito ngayon.

Binuka ko ang labi, handa nang bawiin ang naunang pabor nang magsalita na rin siya. "It's good to know I'm not the only one who's nervous about this. But know what? We can do something instead."

"Huh?"

Ngumiti lang siya at saka hinila ako palabas ng unit niya.

"Are you serious? Hihintayin mo talaga akong makatulog?" tanong ko sa kanya.

Ngumiti si Tyler saka tumango. Hawak niya pa rin yung kamay ko habang nakaupo siya doon sa silya na ipinuwesto niya kanina sa gilid ng kama ko. So, that was his plan. Babantayan niya akong makatulog tapos kapag nangyari na nga iyon ay saka palang siya babalik sa unit niya.