broken ghosts

part twenty-three

FLASHBACK (TAEHYUNG'S FOCUS)

Taehyung had been knocking on the door for ten minutes now and he was starting to get impatient. He knew Jungkook was here, so why would he not come and open ?

He eventually decided to just go in even though the younger didn't like when he came without telling him lately, as if he was afraid his best friend would see something he shouldn't. Taehyung didn't see a reason why he couldn't come in as he wanted —he had always done it, the other's apartment was like his own and they knew everything about each other. There was no secret they hid from the other, so he honestly didn't think Jungkook could want to keep anything from him.

That was until he entered the younger's bedroom only to find him in the middle of a pile of clothes, sleeping with dry tears staining his cheeks.

Taehyung stopped for a moment, his eyes painfully looking at the mess Jungkook had become. Realizing there might be some secrets his best friend would want to keep from him. Because he knew those clothes, he knew all the stuff Jungkook was surrounded by. It was all yours. It all smelled like you, it all held memories of you, it was all so you. As if you were still an invisible presence in the room just by having all your belongings lying around.

Taehyung eventually stepped inside slowly, waking up Jungkook in the same time. As soon as he opened his eyes and saw Taehyung looking at him with sad eyes, he looked around him and immediately started gathering the clothes in a hurry to hide them from his best friend.

"Jungkook," Taehyung started, his voice breaking slightly as he watched his friend trying to hide everything from him as if it would make him forget the painful sight.

"I was just cleaning, don't worry I'm not weird or anything-" Jungkook didn't let him talk, cutting him off panicked.

"Jungkook, why haven't you put all of this away already ?" Taehyung sighed as he fought the tears burning his eyes. He had been telling his best friend it wasn't good to live surrounded by your stuff as if you were still living with him, but obviously Jungkook wouldn't listen.

"This has nothing to do with you so let me just deal with things how I want to," Jungkook said harshly, stopping his frantic movements to look at Taehyung.

"I just want you to live healthily again-"

"Sorry I can't forget her like you did, sorry I can't move on as fast as you did, sorry I lost the fucking love of my life and I can't just throw away her stuff like it's some garbage, sorry I still fucking care," Jungkook snapped as he glared at Taehyung who scoffed in disbelief, his heart hurting in his chest.

"What are you even saying ?! You think I forgot her ? You think I'm not hurting ? Just because I don't show you everything doesn't mean I don't fucking cry every night. Just because I try to stay strong for you doesn't mean my world isn't just as broken as yours."

Jungkook stared at his best friend, gulping hardly in silence —the older always knew how to shut him up. He didn't see this vulnerable side of Taehyung often so it just hurt more now. He bit his lip, trying to come up with something. He knew he should apologize but he was too overwhelmed to even do that. Too weak maybe.

However, Taehyung shook his head without looking at him before leaving the room. And just when Jungkook thought he had lost someone else and it was his fault again, his best friend came back with a box in his hands.

"I brought this for you. You don't have to throw it all away, just put it in a place where you can't see it."

And Jungkook hoped the thankful eyes he turned to Taehyung were enough to make him understand he was sorry. Because in the end, Taehyung was the only one who would always be there for him through thick and thin, even if he was the worst friend in return.