broken ghosts

part twenty-four

Your ringtone got you out of your thoughts as you lay in bed this night. You checked the time : it was almost midnight. Jungkook's name lit up your screen and you cleared your throat before answering his call hesitantly.

"Hey," you said quietly as his soft breath echoed in your ear. You'd be lying if you said you didn't feel some type of way talking on the phone with him at this time of the day. It felt intimate.

"Did I wake you up ?" he asked and you let out a smile when hearing his worried tone.

"No, I was.. thinking about stuff," you whispered after a few seconds. He stayed silent but you could still hear his soothing breathing.

"Do you want to think about stuff with me ?" he eventually breathed out and a feeling you knew all too well took over you.

"Right now ?"

"Yes ? But if you don't-" he said hesitantly, and you cut him off.

"Yeah, okay," you whispered, your heart beating out of your chest. He then told you he was at the hill, and a moment later, you were in your car, a thrilling feeling taking over you.

-

When you arrived, the dark surrounded you as soon as you stepped out of your car. There were no sound, no light, like the world had stopped here. You walked hesitantly towards the place you went to with Taehyung, branches cracking under your steps.

After a few seconds of walking alone in the dark, you spotted someone and you immediately knew it was Jungkook. He was lying on the grass, looking at the sky. You approached slowly before lying down next to him without a word. Your heart seemed to have never beaten so fast.

"Thank you," he whispered after a few seconds, turning towards you. You looked at him and let yourself melt under his pretty eyes gazing at you.

"For what ?" you let out a quiet chuckle, barely above a whisper. He didn't answer and just kept his eyes on you for a moment, as if he was taking in your features. Your blush was hidden by the dark of the night, and you wondered if he was blushing too.

"Look at the sky," he eventually said and you turned your eyes towards the starry sky above you. You let your eyes wander on the constellations, a peaceful feeling taking over you. "I used to think there was nothing more soothing than looking at the stars in this place."

You didn't say anything, letting yourself relax in this moment. You didn't have to say anything, the silence between you didn't feel heavy. It was comforting.

"I used to gaze at the stars for hours thinking that maybe, wherever you were, you were looking at the same stars too." He looked at you after a few seconds, something you couldn't quite read in his eyes. "Could you see the stars ?"

You gulped, not breaking the eye contact. Flashbacks of your little room flooded your mind, suffocating almost. You could still see the small and blinded window barely letting sunlight enter the room. You could still imagine yourself trying desperately to take a glimpse of the outside.

"Yes," you lied, your voice coming out as a whisper, "I could see them every night."

Relief painted his face and warmed your heart. It seemed important to him. He looked back at the stars, a smile that never reached his eyes forming on his lips.

"This place," Jungkook started, his voice barely above a whisper, "It was the only place where we had no memory."

He was gazing at the sky, a peaceful expression on his face, yet every word leaving his mouth felt full of pain.

"You were everywhere. Every street, every store, every coffee shop, it all held a different memory of you." He paused, as if flashbacks were playing in his mind. "Everything reminded me of you. Your favorite song playing on the radio, someone holding a bouquet of your favorite flowers or eating your favorite snacks. All the time, you were everywhere, reminding me all too much that home was the only place where you were missing." He took a deep breath, looking for words. He frowned, as if he couldn't express his thoughts accurately. "I mean, home was where your presence was the strongest, where your scent still filled the air and your voice somehow still echoed in the rooms, but it was also the place where your absence was the loudest."