broken ghosts

part twenty-five

i know some of you don't like flashbacks but i promise it's the last one, i just really like writing them 😔

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FLASHBACK (JUNGKOOK'S FOCUS)

Jungkook lay in bed, empty bottles of alcohol surrounding him pathetically. Today was your birthday, and he hadn't been able to think about anything else than the aching pain of imagining what this day should've looked like.

Your eyes would have sparked as soon as you would've woken up. You would've been excited all day at the idea of the party you were throwing at night. He would've given you a gift before everyone else arrived, just between the two of you within the intimacy of your home, and you would've blushed cutely because he always found exactly what you wished for. You would've danced together all night, surrounded by your friends. You would've ended up tipsy in your shared bed, a dumb smile on both of your faces. You would've had a beautiful birthday, Jungkook told himself all day.

However, this year, he had started the night looking at pictures of you, painful memories filling his mind endlessly as he stared at your smiling face looking at him. Tears had started streaming down his face soon after and he somehow ended up drunk in his bed. He was caught in a turbulence of pain and empty space from missing you.

He pressed the cold glass against his lips over and over again, the intoxicating liquor burning his throat every time. He let his eyes wander around the room, his sight blurry and the roar of blood in his ears deafening. The only sound echoing in the room was his choked sobs as more and more empty bottles lay on the floor with time passing.

He closed his eyes for a second, tears still flowing from his eyes, and when he opened them again, a strange feeling took over him slowly. And when he turned his head towards the empty side of the bed you once shared, his breath hitched as his heartbeat increased.

"Y/N ?" he breathed out as he looked at your pretty face right there, just next to him.

But how could it be you ? How could you be lying next to him when you had gone missing months ago ?

However, these thoughts vanished as fast as they came to his mind, because you looked so real in his eyes, and he wanted you to be there so bad. He choked back tears, his mind overwhelmed by the thousands of emotions he felt at this moment. Slowly, he extended a shaky hand towards you, craving to touch you, holding his breath unconsciously.

But his fingers never reached you, and you disappeared in a blink of an eye as his hand fell on the sheets. His sobs started all over again, heavier, more painful. Because a second ago, you were right there, so close to him, and the next one he was alone in bed, his loneliness hitting him even more. He swore he could still smell your sweet scent, more exhilarating than the bitter liquor he had been drinking all night.

A few drinks later, your scent tickled his nose again and when he looked at your side of the bed, you were back there, smiling at him softly. His eyes filled with tears as he smiled back at you, his heart aching. This time, he didn't try to touch you, only gazing at the face he missed so much. The face he loved unconditionally.

It felt so real. Everything about you was just like he remembered. But deep down, he knew his brain was fooling him. He had drunk too much, and now he was getting his heart broken all over again as a consequence.

But it felt so good to lie there next to you, just like he used to. He didn't want it to stop. It hurt like hell but it was also the happiest he had felt in long. That's why he never stopped smiling, looking at you lovingly, his hand slowly letting go of the bottle he was holding.