TW: This book has a lot of descriptions of abuse and because of how often it is, there are no trigger warnings at the beginning of chapters. Take this as a warning for the whole book.
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Samuel never thought that moving out of his childhood home wo...
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xxv. Red Rose Apologies
It had already been a few days after I stopped all contact with Samuel, and I couldn't say I was doing great. My hand was slowly healing, but my heart was still in pieces. I laid on the floor of the apartment and steadily breathed in and out.
Taylor was still angry I had forgotten about our anniversary, and in all honesty, I would have been too. She hadn't spoken to me much, and whatever she said to me came out in a harsh tone that was meant to cut at me. Over the past few days, I noticed that her words were slowly beginning to lose their effect on me, and I hoped that the woman wouldn't notice it.
Like earlier when she had gone on a rant about how useless I was and how she was the only person who loved me, I just looked at her with no emotion. It was like something had snapped in me and I couldn't feel anything anymore. Not long ago, her words used to hurt me immensely, but now they were just part of a routine. Maybe this was because I had heard those exact same words so many times before and now fully accepted that her words were true.
Words can't hurt me if I knew they were facts. That's what I kept telling myself, anyway.
As I laid on the floor, I realised that I was bored. I'd finished my work for today a little while ago and now had nothing productive to do. Taylor wouldn't be home until a few hours later, so I was completely alone. Only then did I realise how much Samuel helped me. Not only was he someone who wanted to listen to me talk about things, but he was the only person I spent time with outside of my girlfriend.
I missed him. I missed watching football matches with him, and trying shitty beers that tasted like piss. I missed the way we'd just talk about everything and nothing at the same time, and how he'd laugh at something I said during our late night conversations. I just missed him. I missed Samuel, and there was nothing I could do about it. Not now anyway.
I heard soft music come from the TV that I had left turned on so I wouldn't feel so alone. I turned my head to look at it and saw a date scene, one fully equipped with the cliché red roses and dinner for two under fairy lights. Seeing this gave me an idea, and I quickly stood up and rushed out of the door, making sure to grab my wallet as I did so.
I still had a while to prepare for when Taylor would come home, so I made sure to use my time wisely. I bought a bouquet of beautiful red roses, a bottle of her favourite wine, and ingredients for her favourite dish. Tonight would be perfect, and hopefully Taylor would forgive me for forgetting.
...
I grinned as I placed the food into the oven, I had time to change and get ready for Taylor's return. As the food cooked in the oven, I took a shower, changed into something nice, and styled my hair. I'd gotten a haircut yesterday, so it was actually possible to properly style it. For the first time in a while, I was excited to see Taylor.
After making myself look more presentable and taking care of my wounds, I decorated our kitchen with candles to make the dining area look better. I placed a glass vase into the middle of the table and filled it with some water so that the roses could be placed there later.
