In My Mind's Eye

Chapter Twelve

Alright. So I was working on a draft, but it didn't save (even though I pressed save lots of times and it said "Saved!"). I liked the first version better, so I tried to get it back. Unfortunately, it couldn't be recovered. I don't know why, but I'm kind of upset. :(

Oh well! Moving on from the past (in more ways than one) and onto the future! Err... present. Or something. Hope this one turns out better than the first! Probably will...

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"Damnit, Aamori! Why the HELL is this so hard?!" Kadan yelled at me in frustration. His face was a bright red color as he glared at me. "It's a fucking SQUIRREL! It should be the easiest thing you've ever done and, yet, you can't do it worth shit!" He motioned at the motionless squirrel that was sitting in front of me. He was attempting to make me conjure one from thin air. In other words, one of the hardest things I've ever done.

I was crouched down on the ground, too exhausted to even to move. This lesson alone was lasting hours. I could feel the strain on my body in each painful breath I took and each agonizing move I made.

When we left my parents' house we never went back; Kadan and Kit both seemed hesitant to... as if they were afraid that I would start screaming and crying again if I went back. As I got older, Kadan started to train me, trying to teach me things my parents would have. He tended to be almost cruel when he was, especially if I wasn't getting something. He would yell louder and be more demanding. I would just wish I could disappear at those moments. His anger was more than volatile. It was practically a death sentence for some.

For me, it was terrifying. I stayed silent, praying for my shell of a squirrel to come to life. Please. Please. Please! I begged.

"Man, you should lay off of her. Look at her; even if she was able to do it under normal circumstances, she couldn't now. She can barely even move," Kit muttered, studying me too carefully. It had been twelve years since we had included him in our "family", so he was well into his twenties. I shot him a quick death stare and he quickly looked away. Even as old as he was, he looked good. His hair was a lighter red-blonde color and his eyes were light green. His face was clean, and his muscles, well-defined.

As good as Kit looked, I had to admit that Kadan looked better. Kadan's hair was still jet black, but if the sun hit it right, the would be bluish tints toward the top of his head. His face and body looked like they were chisled by some expert sculptor. His clothes -- no matter what he would -- always looked amazing on him, showing off all his muscles in all the right places.

Unlike Kit, Kadan hadn't aged at all. He was the exact same age and looked the exact same as he did twelve years earlier. A year before he started working for my dad, he bacame the youngest sorcerer to master the spell that gave him eternal youth. I had a feeling he was trying to make me do the same.

"Shut up, Tittyboy," Kadan grumbled. Kit huffed. No, Kit's nickname had not changed, even after I learned what it meant. That simply made it funnier... More funny.

"Don't call me that!" Kit groaned, frustrated. Kadan simply rolled his eyes. Suddenly, he because serious.

"Aamori. Did you make the squirrel come to life yet?" I shook my head. "Did you make a new one?" I shook my head again. He groaned in frustration, running a hand through his black hair. "I'll tell you what," he began. "You make a real, live squirrel, and you won't have any lessons for a week. Alright?"

I shook my head. "Three.'

"One."

"Two?"

"One."

"Two, please?" I said, staring at him with pleading eyes.

"Fine," he grumbled, defeated. I yelled out in joy. "Do it then, damnit," he huffed. I nodded, then cleared my mind.

I closed my eyes, concentrating on making the shell of my squirrel come to life. I tried to imagine how his soft fur would feel, tickling my fingers and how he would let out little squeaks of curiosity or fear. I pictured how he would move, searching for food or a mate. How his tail would twitch slightly, even when the rest of him was perfectly still. How he would pounce on spots he thought held food or other various "squirrelish" treasures.

I could feel a tickle against my arm, that felt how I thought the squirrel would. Kadan and Kit stared in partial shock. I heard Kadan swear a bit under his breath. Kit opened and closed his mouth uselessly, trying to form words. I ignored them, proud of myself and the squirrel that I made. He crawled into my hands, looking at me expectantly. I set him in a tree, thinking he would want to be there instead of with me.

He nuzzled close to me and curled up in my arms when we got to the tree, falling asleep instead. I smiled, exhausted. Maybe it wouldn't be too hard becoming an immortal like Kadan.