Near Yet Still So Far

✿NYSSF 5✿

I manage to control my emotions. None of them notice that I cried. This is a big achievement for me. I can hide what I truly felt.

Well, everyone does this. It's not new. We often hide what we truly feel, in order to avoid criticisms.

Or maybe we just don't want them to see our weak sides.

It's so difficult to lie about what we truly feels.

It's so difficult not to express what you truly feels. It's like someone stabbed you and you can't even cry in pain.

But I should keep this attitude of mine. Starting today, I'll cry silently. I don't want them to be sad because of me. I want to keep this problem of mine on my own.

Right now, I'm at Miss Rosé's office, as usual. I'm glad that my treatment to her doesn't change. I don't want to be unfair to her. It seems like she know nothing about my relationship with her boyfriend. And I'm okay with that.

I just stared at Miss Rosé. I hate to admit it, but I'm insecure with her. How can I not be? The man I love is in love with her.

"Dahyun, is there something wrong with my face?" she asked, she checked her face on her phone. "I don't have dirt in my face. Why are you staring at me?"

I force a smiled. "Nothing, Miss. I'm just thinking something, I haven't notice I'm staring at you. "

She just laughed. "I thought you find me beautiful."

I smiled. "You're already beautiful, Miss. Inside and out."

"Oh, thank you. I can say the same to you. You never failed to amaze me," she laughed. "I'm glad I met you. You're a true friend to me."

I just smiled. I'm a bit guilty. I want to tell Miss Rosé that Jimin is my ex boyfriend, I don't want to keep secrets to her. But I know she won't like it when she finds out. That might change her treatment to me.

"I'm sorry, Miss."

She laughed. "Dahyun, what are you saying? What are you sorry for?"

"O-oh, a-about what happen last saturday, Miss. Sorry for lying," I said

Sometimes, I want to cut my tongue.

"No need to say sorry. I was so happy that time, and it's all because of Jimin, Jooheon and especially, you."

I smiled. "Thank you, Miss."

"I should be the one thanking you. You're the one who suggested that place, right?" I nodded. "The place is so beautiful. Everything that day was beautiful, and I won't forget that day."

"I'm glad you loved it, Miss. I'm glad you're happy that time. At least, the stress you felt disappeared even just for a day."

"Yeah, I know. But it would be fun if Jooheon and you didn't left so early. You could've talk to Jimin," she said while smiling

I swallowed a few times. "Y-yeah, I'm sorry about that, Miss. I j-just need to go home because of my friend."

"Did something happened?"

"M-my friend and h-her boyfriend broke up, right! They b-broke up, that's why I need to be there, before s-suicide cross in her mind," I said

"Oh, that's sad. Is your friend okay?"

"She's doing fine, Miss. We m-manage to stopped her."

Oh, goodness! Please forgive me for lying. I just need to lie for the greater good.

"Dahyun, can I ask you a little favor? Just a little favor. Can I?" she asked

I nodded. "Of course, Miss. What is it?"