Inanimate Insanity/BFB/TPOT Oneshots!

Poly 4X2 Fluff (Hurt/Comfort)

(A/N): I saw this ship on twitter and my heart went "skdjfhksdjhflk", so I did what anyone else would likely do and proceed to spend actual time writing a oneshot for people on the internet to either go "haha cool" or "what no" to. Either way, I hope you read it and enjoy it.

Stay safe!

TW/// PANIC ATTACKS (this is a hurt/comfort fic)

3rd POV

X knew very well what kind of trouble xe was in. TPOT hadn't even officially started, yet xe found that xe had a strange attraction to the new number, 2. What made matters even worse was that xe already, and still had, a crush on 4. Whoops! And to wrap everything up with a cute little bow, 4 hated 2. Or so it seemed.

In 4's mind, it was in about the same amount of trouble X was in, although neither of them knew it. 4 had always felt an attraction to the small variable, but it also found a similar attraction to the new number, 2.

So, given this information, one might assume that a bizarre love triangle was present and that the two would have to fight over the new host. Perhaps that would be the case if none of the numbers were polyamorous.

So this situation was very awkward. The contestants on both sides of the shows had made a mutual (as far as that word's meaning can stretch) agreement that the three algebraliens needed to get along much better. The obvious solution to this was apparently to shut the numbers in a closet. A number-proof, completely closed off from the rest of the world closet, courtesy of Golf Ball. Clever girl, they always thought, but never that she would betray them. Nonetheless, here they were.

X POV

I edged closer next to 4. Even though things weren't very good between us right now, I still felt safer with it than I did with 2. He seemed nice but I just never acclimated easily to new people, especially when they appear randomly. So right now, 4 was my comfort, and we were all clearly uncomfortable.

I looked up at 4, who was staring down 2. It almost seemed like they were having an argument telepathically, though they weren't, because I know 4 can't do that. 2 might be able to, but I haven't known him for long enough to be able to tell. But this situation was getting tense, and I couldn't help but feel a familiar tightening in my chest.

"F-four..." I whispered, inching closer to him. "I... uh... I'm sorry..." I squeezed 4's arm four times signaling to it silently that I was about to have an attack. I heard it mutter a small curse under its breath as he shifted uncomfortably, moving its gaze from 2 and back to me.

"May I ask what is happening?" Two asked. I felt my breath hitch in my throat as my heart rate sped up exponentially.

"I... I...." Everything around me crashed down, and I fell into 4 and its grasp enveloped me as it attempted to soothe me with slow rubs on my back.

"In and out, breathe. Breathe in and out slowly, calm down. I'm here." I grabbed it and pulled in in closer to me, trying to calm myself down as my chest tightened. I heard shuffling around the room and then I heard a second voice next to me.

"Take some deep breaths and focus on four okay. We're here for you." I get a second gaze on me as I took in some deep breaths, calming myself down.

"I'm sorry Four... I didn't mean to..." I was cut off by a tight embrace.

"Shhh, it's okay, X. Sometimes it just happens. You don't need a reason." Four said into my shoulder.

"Yeah, and if it makes you feel any better, I'll get them sometimes too!" Two added, kneeling down next to us.

"Thank you... I really was scared you guys would start fighting..." I whispered out to them.

"Fight? No way! Just because we don't like eachother doesn't mean we would fight! And I'm not even sure we dislike eachother, I think you're nice, Four..." 4 shifted and rubbed the back of its neck.

"I think you're pretty nice too, so can we get along?" 4 looked up at 2, almost as if it was expecting something.

"Sure thing! Now... eheheh... I have something else to ask the both of you, and I give my apologies in advance if I come off as a bit headstrong... now..." 2 cleared his throat. "Would the both of you be interested in... ahem... perhaps going on a date sometime? With me? Again, sorry if I-" 4 cut him off with a gentle kiss to the cheek. I giggled and kissed on the opposite side.

"Oh." 2 blushed heavily. "I take that as a yes then?"

"Hehe! Of course, two! I really like you, and I hope we can be good boyfriends!" I exclaimed happily.

"B-boyfriends?" 2 asked.

"If that's what you want!" 4 stood up, and then reached out its hands and helped the both of us stand up.

"It's settled then!" 2 said joyously, grabbing the both of us in for a big hug. I jumped slightly. "Sorry..." I laughed.

"It's okay, two! Just maybe give us a warning next time!" I returned the hug. "Now, let's find a way out of this closet, shall we?" The two numbers nodded, as we all looked at the door. The door that had just been opened by a surprised looking golfball.