Surreal

Chapter 15 | Letters

The coal-black coat of Hercules shimmers and burns in the bright afternoon sunlight of this blissful summer day, and even in my sorrow of missing James, it's hard to restrain a much needed smile. Green grass, blue skies, and an assortment of different flowers blend into a beautiful mesh of colors, and it reminds me of the perfect times before the war.

With James gone, Gail and Hercs have been restlessly grazing and sleeping in the pasture, longing to get out and be ridden. I couldn't stand their misery, so I've been continuously riding them each day.
However lonely it may be.

It's hard to keep from wondering what James is doing. I haven't received a single letter or telegram, but I don't know whether to think that is good or bad. Maybe he is busy and unable to write. Maybe there has been an accident and-

Quickly erasing the subject from my mind, I tug the reigns around, clicking Hercs on back towards home. His hooves pound into the ground, much lighter than Gail's, but the familiar beat of his canter reminds me of James.

By the time the tip of the cottage peeks over the small mound in front of the house, poor Hercules is covered in lather, so I steer him towards the water trough. But before we reach the farmyard, my mother's high-pitched shouting from the cottage doorway captures my attention.

She is calling my name.

My palms almost instantly moisten from nervous sweat, and I can already feel my heart breaking.

Please tell me James is safe. Please tell me James is safe.

Hercs slows to a trot and I yank the reigns to a halt, jumping from his back and dashing up to mum.

"Katherine!" she yells excitedly.

"Mum, what? What is it? What's happened?" I blurt the questions desperately.

"I was in town, and there's a letter for you," she smiles. "It's from James."

"Oh my goodness, thank God!" I exclaim, "Where is it?"

She laughs, pulling out a sealed envelope from her skirt pocket, "It came not three hours ago."

"Thank you, mum," I give her a grateful hug, but remembering Hercs I pull away, "Oh no, I need to tend to Hercs-"

"No, no. You go on in and read your letter. I'll tend to the horse," she offers happily.

"Thanks," I smile, quick to accept.

I run inside, quickly setting tea to brew, and sit myself comfily on the sheets of our bed. Tearing open the letter, my cheeks feel numb from smiling. His handwriting his perfectly neat, like the artist he is, and tears form in my eyes as I read:

My Darling Katherine,

If it was at all possible to put into words how much I miss you, I would...

And I don't try to keep the tears from trailing down my cheeks.

The beautifully written letter explains the tardiness of the arrival of his letter, and at the bottom of the second page he has signed: With All My Love, James.

A scribbled P.S. catches my attention, and it reads "Don't forget to wear that new gown for me."

He never did get to see me in it, did he?

•••

An angry growl rumbles across my stomach and up through my chest, vibrating in my throat. Quickly, I pick up the edges of my skirt and run outside, behind the house, where I uncontrollably retch, my sides hitching. As if the retching and the smells weren't bad enough, my uncomfortable stomach cramps force me to tramp back inside and plump down in the middle of the bed, close my eyes, and try to ignore the terrible pounding in my head.

Two weeks. The doctor told me that I am two weeks pregnant. At first, I had every reason not to believe him; who on earth gets pregnancy signs so soon? But once he explained that my mother was the same way when pregnant with me, I vomited.

Now I have to lie down and try to ignore the pain hammered itself into every bone in my weak body. If James were here, he'd probably be worrying his head off, wandering around the house looking for something that could help my pain. He might even have had a pot of tea for me.

How am I going to tell him? A letter? I feel as if that is the very informal way of doing it, but he must know as soon as I can possibly manage. I can't just tell the Germans to cease fire while I tell my husband I'm pregnant. No, I have write him.

Ignoring the pain in my lower stomach as I try to sit up in the bed, I wobble over the the desk, snatching a piece of paper and grabbing a pencil. Once I sit down my head spins from the sudden impact, but once the stars disappear I begin to write.

Dear James,

As always, you're forgiven for the lateness of your letter. I can't blame you for time you can't find. I only wish we could both find more of it together, whether through letters or thought. Know that I'm always thinking of you.

The men sound lovely, James. Any man would be lucky to have them as friends. I'm glad to know you're in good company out there, and I hope someday you can introduce me to them all.

Nothing has changed here in Canterbury. Your mum comes often to visit me, and she has been such a great help. And, of course, Hercs misses you.

You know I'm not good at writing words like you are, so I'll get to the point of this letter.

You'll never believe the news I have for you, James. I'm pregnant!

Can you believe it? The doctor told me I have early pregnancy signs, like my mother, and that I am two weeks pregnant.
I do hope this is all over by the time it's born, I want us to name him together.

And there I go, already calling it a he. It's going to look just like you, James.

--

A/N:

Heyy, long time no update! Sorry about that, but I really thought I could possibly get eight votes on the latest chapter! Anyways.

Here's your update! Tell me what you think!

So this time we'll start small. 3 votes till the next update, yeah? Sound good? I love you guys.

- 〽️️iddleAsgard, at your service.