𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘳𝘥 - NCT Johnny

Eighteen - Querencia

Johnny's apartment was fresh and clean, big and modern. It looked expensive but again your father probably was paying for it all.

You wake up for school and found yourself alone on Johnny's bed. You can't really remember what happened after the park, you weren't fully awake. You had no idea how you got on this bed.
Shoot. It's time for school and you're late.

You rush out the bedroom and yell out Johnny's name. The bathroom door was left open for you and your clothes were laid out on the chair next to the bed. It only took you about 20 minutes to fully get ready.

You go out to the living room and look for Johnny. He wasn't there. You look for your phone and notice a paper note on the table.

"sorry had to leave early this morning to speak with your father. i'll have one of his men drive you to school. he should be outside waiting for you. see you later.
- Johnny"

you were kind of disappointed you wouldn't go to school with him today. but got over it. what could he possibly talk about with your dad?

Johnny was absent at school today. He never arrived so this worried you. You sent him a text asking him where he was and if everything was okay but never got a reply.
It was like there was a hole inside of you. You missed him.

The day felt so much longer without Johnny. You were impatiently waiting for school to be over so you could go look for him.

Finally. The last bell rang and you rushed out the classroom. You were hoping he'd pop out by now. Maybe if you waited for him he'd show up. All the students were gone now. You were alone in the hallway walking towards the exit when you saw a dark figure approach you.

johnny: miss me?

you were so happy to hear his voice.

you: you? not a chance

Johnny smirked. He knew you were lying.

Felt like old times again walking home together.

johnny: still don't wanna go home?

you: I'm not ready to go back there yet

johnny: hmm alright we'll need to go somewhere then

you: where are you takin me?

johnny: you'll see

He drove you off into the unknown. With everything that's been happening lately you realized how lucky you were to have him. You held on tighter to his waist today. Johnny felt that. So he smiled.
Looks like he was taking you to the mall.

johnny: alright. we're here.

you: what are we doing here?

johnny: buying you clothes, what else? you don't wanna go home right? well you have no clothes at my apartment you have to buy some.

You didn't even think of that. He was right.

Johnny slowly reached over to grab your hand, crisscrossing his fingers with yours. This surprised you. But you didn't reject it.

johnny: you used to hold my hand like this you know

You didn't know what to say, you just couldn't remember. But it somehow felt right. So you let it be.
Johnny was your querencia. Home wasn't a place, it was a feeling. It was him.

He walked inside the stores with you. Stayed by your side while you picked out clothes, tried them on and bought them. Why did this feel like a date?

It was so ironic, you became the shy kid and Johnny became the lead. Your roles completely switched from when you were little.

Johnny let go off your hand after you got in the first shop. But you got used to his touch. So much so, while walking by him you suddenly grabbed his hand out of pure reflex.
Then realizing what you just did, stopped all movements, released your grip, and got all shy super red. This was awkward and weird. It's not something you'd do. So why did your body react on its own?

Johnny noticed how shy you got and smiled.

johnny: it's okay. you can hold my hand if you want

You shook your head no.
You were in deep denial. It felt so right but was so wrong. You guys weren't a couple. So you fought the feelings you developed for Johnny. You didn't want to let yourself fall for him. Especially since he's your bodyguard. It would ruin your current bond.

you: can we go home?

This shopping thing was making you way too uncomfortable. You had enough clothes for a week and that was enough for now.

From now on out you couldn't see Johnny the same anymore. On his bike, you didn't hold on to him as tightly as before. You barely put your hands on his hips. You were distancing yourself. Afraid that your feelings would grow stronger.

Johnny of course caught on to your change in behavior. He was worried but didn't say a word.

Once back at his place johnny asked where you wanted the bag of clothes. you told him the living room would be fine.

johnny: you can shower first, we'll take turns

While avoiding eye contact you walked very fast and stiffly to the bathroom then locked the door behind you. With your back against the door you slid down to the ground.

You were lost in your thoughts. Things were changing. Johnny got less mean and more open. You wanted him to do this but ... had no idea it'd turn out this way.

And at this very moment you realized you were badly falling in love.

~