✧𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐘 𝐁𝐎𝐌𝐁✧𝕁𝕖𝕗𝕗 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕜✧

💣🍒x-1.12-x🍒💣

September 8th
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·̩̩̥͙＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　Sleepless Nights　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊·̩̩̥͙

It was 2am and I was making a cup hot cocoa, Jeff was in bed asleep leaving me downstairs with Nerf who was snuggled up into the throw blanket that was on the couch.

The reason why I was up, was that I had a nightmare. I didn't want to wake Jeff and be all soppy asking him to give me a hug and all the that jazz. I woke up really hot and flustered, I shifted myself in a sat up position and sat there for about 10 minutes. Silent. In the dark. Just me and my thoughts. My angels. My demons. That's when I came to the conclusion on getting up and coming down here.

After my cocoa was finished of being in the coffee machine....yes I bought cocoa capsules to put into my coffee machine, very scandalous of me, I know. I slithered my hand round the mug handle and went to sit outside of the balcony.

I put my drink down and leaned across the railing. The cold bars hit my bare stomach as I was wearing a black laced bralette and grey jogging shorts. My hair was now in a messy bun, so I could get it out of my face due to the wind being a bitch, as it kept blowing my hair.

Leaning against the bar, my mind began to wonder. I started to think about my past and how it helped me shape who I am now...well there is still apart of my I'm still discovering but that's for another sleepless night.

I started to reminisce of the teachings my dad taught me. 'Easy things won't last long and long things won't come easy.' Which now I'm YouTuber I can see where he's coming from. Being in the public eye does make things harder....but having a job, that can buy me a house, provide for a family if I ever decided to have one, help others....that's definitely something that will be forever lasting.

'Don't jump the gun.' That was one of his favourite sayings...every time he used to make my brothers and I lunch, we always checked what the filling was in the sandwich, due to one time he gave us all ones that had mud inside.

My older brother, Ash was the first one to eat his sandwich, which became a big shock to him that it wasn't Nutella. It was an April fools joke and he said 'Ash, don't jump the gun son...that goes for all of you.' which then we instantly checked our sandwiches. Then he proceeded to say, 'That goes for anything in life whether that be a Job opportunity, a person your starting to like or ya know....having....' he was immediately interrupted by mum who informed him that he was going to far with his explanation...that was besides the point.

That teaching, saying, call it whatever....really stuck with me.....that's why I'm so nervous about Jeff and I. I feel like it's too quick but then at times...I feel like I could just ask him to marry me. We are so comfortable with each other. We are so alike in ways I didn't know we could be alike...for example I spell 'nanny' with an 'ie' and he does it the exact same. He is the only person I know who does that....my own brothers, flesh and blood, don't do that.

As they say the devil is in the detail....I'm probably going into deep....but this is what this man does to me. I thought it was just an innocent little crush on his end....however here I am....falling for a guy I've known for about a week....

'Ari?'

Hearing a voice from behind me, I turned kicking the chair that was on the balcony straight the way, 'Go Away Josh!' I shouted.

Appearing out from the shadows...it was Jeff. In his shorts, topless, hair sticking out in all directions. 'It's just me.' He says softly with his hands up, stepping closer to me. At this moment, I was shaking. 'You okay?'

'Yeah....I'm fine.' I say as I gulped. Fuck he's going to ask who Josh is.

'Erm...what you doing awake?'

'I-I Erm......ok fuck it....I had a nightmare.' I say bring my hands down to my legs. 'But I'm okay now. What you doing awake?' I ask trying to change the subject.

'I got up to go for a piss....' He says. Jeff knew something was up. He wasn't stupid. He wasn't one to be fooled easily....he definitely wasn't like my brother, Lou. 'Erm....who's Josh?'

Fuck! He asked....time to come clean.

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