Portrait behind bars

Eins

Chapter 1

"How was your trip with your friends?" agad na tanong sa akin ni mommy pagkapasok ko ng bahay

"It was great" tipid kong sagot sa kanya

"That's good to hear" nakangisi niyang sagot sa akin

"Mom, ikaw pa ang nagpadala ng spy or someone..." nagdadalawang isip kong tanong sa kanya, "Ahmmm... Nevermind" dagdag ko na lang pero mukha siyang natigilan

"Yes, honey. Why?" matamis na ngiting sambit niya

"I want to ask you the same question. Why?"

"Was it useful?"

"Mom, can you please stop making somethings uncomfortable"

"If you can't do it by yourself. I'll do something, Joyce" sigaw niya sa akin

"Mom, Nickie is my friend. Yes, she might don't know us but there will be a day she will knew everything"

"How sure are you that she will accept you again"

"I'm one hundred percent sure mom that she will accept me even I hid the truth. Hindi ako nag-iisa na nagtago sa kanya ng katotohanan"

"Well, let's see"

Napailing na lang ako sa sagutan namin ni mommy. Ever since Nickie's back, she always tell me na ipagtatabuyan ako ni Nickie. I know our argument sounds nothing to everyone but it's a big deal to me because having a family like them, I rather choose my friends than them.

"Mom, please stop doing something that will scare Nickie or some of my friends" sambit ko bago naglakad papunta sa taas kung nasaan ang kwarto ko.

"Sorry honey, it won't happen. Hangga't may Sandoval hindi mawawala ang kalaban" sagot niya sa akin kaya napatigil ako sa paakyat

"Bakit ba ang init ng dugo mo sa mga Sandoval? Seems like they did something horrible to you" iritado kong sagot sa kanya

"Maybe you're right"

"What?" naguguluhan kong tanong

"Nickie's family stop their wrong dids since what happened to Nickie and I bet they will never came back from what they did before. Kaya mom, please stop what are you planning" pakiusap ko sa kanya

"Why you always protect her? That Nickie girl doesn't do anything to you. She's always on the top at ikaw nasaan ka? Hindi mo nga siya maabutan" bulyaw sa akin ni mommy. Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko at bumaba ulit tapos nilapitan siya.

"Now I know, you see her as my competitor. I always did my best Mom. I don't compete with my friends. Nickie is someone I can lean on. Don't compare me with someone else because I know myself more than you do" mahinahon kong sagot sa kanya habang pinipigilan ang mga nagbabadya kong mga luha

"Are you sure you did your best? I don't see it, hindi ka nga nakakuha ng kahit na award or even special award when you graduated high school. Those friends you have are not good to you" sambit niya sa akin habang nakatingin sa mga mata ko.

"Basehan ba ang awards para masabing matalino? Basehan ba ang mataas na grado para masabing masipag ka?" saad ko habang pinipigalan ang sarili na huwag sumigaw.

I still respect my mom. She raise me after all.

"You're just nothing like your Kuya Emil"

"Who's shoe should I put my self just to be the best you want?" saad ko habang umaagos pa rin ang mga luha

Napabuntong-hininga na lang ako habang inaantay siyang magsalita. Pinipigilan ko pa rin ang sarili ko na huwag gagawa ng ikakasama ko.

"Can you please stop comparing me to others because I'm not like them and I will never be them. I have my own life, mom. Ever since I started studying, nawala na yung kalayaan ko. I always said yes to you and dad."