Kabanata 16
I was awaken by a call from my phone in the middle of the night. I answered it without looking at the caller ID.
"Hello?"
"I'm outside your apartment." he answered and hung up the call. Umayos muna ako ng upo sa kama at bahagyang kinusot ang aking mata para malinaw na mabasa ang pangalan ng tumawag. Travis.
I groaned. Agad akong tumayo at sinuot ang tsinelas at robe bago lumabas at pagbuksan ng pinto si Travis. Nakakunot ang noo nito nang magtama ang aming mga mata.
"I didn't said good bye." aniya.
Napatanga naman ako sa sinabi nito. "You came all the way here just to tell me that? In the middle of the night?" I asked.
Umiwas ito ng tingin sa akin at saka tumango. "I don't know what's up with you." sabi ko, "Come in." sabay bukas ng pinto para makapasok siya.
Agad itong umupo sa sofa at sumandal. Halatang napagod ito sa byahe, alas dose na ng madaling araw at mukhang magdamag ito nag drive. His place is about two hours away from me at mas matagal ang biyahe lalo na't rush hour na nang umalis kami.
"May gusto ka bang inumin?"
Nilingon ako nito at umiling. He tapped the space beside him motioning me to sit. I immediately walked to his place and sat. "Bakit ngayon ka pa bumyahe? Puwede mo naman ipagpabukas ang sasabihin mo." sabi ko.
"I can't stop thinking of what you said." he started, "Why didn't you tell me that your flight was moved?" he asked.
Huminga naman ako nang malalim at sumandal sa sofa. My eyes were still sleepy.
"Kanina ko lang din nalaman. Sasabihin ko rin naman sayo kaso mas nauna lang na nagtanong si Cindy." I chuckled.
Wala itong sinabi at taimtim lang na tumingin sa akin. His deep set of eyes are looking at me, parang nalulunod ako sa paraan ng pagtingin nito. They were telling me something I just can't figure out. When they said that eyes can't hide the true feelings someone has, they weren't kidding. Because I can see it in his. He was confused and broken inside.
"May problema ba?" I asked.
"Remember when we were in college? You taught me how to court a woman." he started.
Ngumiti ako sa sinabi nito, "Of course, pa'no ko malilimutan 'yun? Para kang hindi nanonood ng romantic movies kasi wala kang kaalam-alam sa panliligaw."
"I remember when you chose what flowers I should give to someone." he paused "You picked the rose and you got hurt."
With what he said, different images flashed my mind. Taking me back to that specific scenario.
"I panicked when I saw you bleed." he continued, "But you keep on telling me that you're fine and it was just a scratch. You're even laughing at my reaction."
Natawa ako nang maalala iyon, "Well, you are overreacting." I shrugged, "Bakit mo naman nasabi 'yan bigla? Ang weird mo ah." biro ko rito.
"Naisip ko lang, na kahit nasasaktan ka na, pinili mo pa ring itago ang tunay mong nararamdaman, just to make others feel at ease." aniya, "And that what makes me admire you. I never told you, but I learned how to love you during those moments we were together."
My world stopped.
My eyes were just focused on his and my mouth won't even open and speak a word because of what he said. Unknowingly, a tear escaped my eyes. My heart felt like exploding and I can't even find the right words to describe what I'm feeling right now. The only thing on my mind right now is that, even for a short period of time, Travis loved me.
"Bakit mo sinasabi sa akin lahat ito?" kunot noong sabi ko rito, "Bakit ngayon pa? Bakit ngayon lang?" Isang hikbi ang lumabas mula saakin dahil sa pag-iyak.
Itinaas ni Travis ang kanyang kamay at pinunasan ang aking mga luha. "Maraming mga bagay akong napagtanto simula nang may mangyari sa atin Rachel" anito, "There are a lot of things going on my mind but I can't do anything about it."
"MAY IBA pa ba siyang sinabi bukod dun?" tanong ni Jay.
Kinaumagahan ay tinawagan ko si Jay para sabihin sa kanya ang mga nangyari. I am so thankful for having him as my friend, because I know he won't judge me and he'll try to understand every situation and give his own opinion.
Umiling naman ako, "Wala na bukod pa dun. Agad din naman siyang umuwi dahil may trabaho rin siya."
Isang malalim na buntong hininga ang pinakawalan ni Jay, "Chelly, to be honest, kahit naman sinabi niya ang mga 'yun, wala naman na tayong magagawa e." batid nito.
"Alam ko naman 'yun."
"I think you should start moving on. We should!" aniya, "Gugulo lang ang buhay natin kapag ginalaw pa natin ang nakaraan. Dati na 'yun e, masyado nang malayo kung babalikan pa."
Tinignan ko ito, "You think it's for the better?" I asked.
"It is."
