Arms Length

Chapter 20: My thoughts vs. my Feelings

Sitting in silence never bothered me, even as a kid I welcomed silence. Now? The silence in this hotel room is deafening and suffocating. I chew on my cuticle and look at the blinking cursor on the open email to Danny and Laura. I've re-read the email over and over again, thanking both of them for the opportunity though it was short-lived but no longer wish to intern with or for Billie Eilish effective immediately. I sigh and shut my laptop, push myself off the bed pulling my hair up into messy bun and walk out of room and down to the hotel bar. I almost expect to see Sophie and Billie buddied up together in the adjacent restaurant but the only patrons are an older married couple having an animated conversation, and a blonde with her head in a digital camera and her phone between her shoulder and her ear.

I take a seat at the bar and order a glass of wine and have every intention of finishing the bottle; I set my phone on the bar next to me, why? I don't know, its just been weighing down the back pocket of my jeans like a brick. I take a sip of wine and a deep breath to keep from crying.

"Nice tattoo." I hear a female voice say behind me. I'm not drunk enough, nor am I single...that I'm aware of...?

"Thanks." I say flatly. "A friend of mine from college drew it."

"Like, I wouldn't recognize my own work..." Grey says setting her stuff down as she sits in cushy bar stool next to me with a big smile.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I ask giving her an awkward hug trying not to spill my wine.

"Work trip for one, and Gloria's getting married tomorrow, so she asked me to shoot her wedding" She says rolling her eyes. "May I get a double Jack and Coke please?" She says to the bartender handing him her card.

"I never took Gloria for the marrying type...." I take another drink of my wine.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm a summer intern for Billie Eilish...or was... still contemplating."

"Why contemplating?" Grey asks stirring her drink before taking a sip.

"Ugh its such a long story..." I say rolling my eyes, "but basically the other intern I work with has been a thorn in my side since tour began. She's Billie's manager's favorite, she's gets away with the bare minimum and she's gorgeous." I roll my eyes.

"She sounds like a cunt." Grey says with a shrug causing me to almost spit my wine out.

"I-wow."

"She also sounds like she's jealous of you." And Bingo was his NAME-O!

I sigh, "I may have flirted with Billie a little." I shrug nonchalantly.

Grey laughs shaking her head. "Okay Bunny, I'm straight and even I want to do more than flirt with Billie Eilish."

"She'd probably flirt back with you."

"Then all of Ian's fantasies would come true." She rolls her eyes taking another sip of her drink.

"Gross." I snicker into my wine glass.

I'm not sure how long I've been talking to Grey, but I know I've finished the bottle of wine, she's had at least 2 more Jack and Cokes. I also don't know what we've been laughing about, but the 4 other patrons at the bar are looking at us strangely as Grey is snort laughing and I'm covering half my face with my hand and wheezing; I also know I'm going to be fighting a wine-headache in the morning. But honestly, I don't care.

"Hey, Bunny..." Grey says coughing a bit catching her breath, "Why is that chick staring at you?" I look over my shoulder to see who she's talking about and see Sophie standing there with a grin on her face.