Arms Length

Chapter 31: The queen and I

**Billie**

I thought waking up with Jade's naked body wrapped around me would be a wonderful feeling, but the bed is empty, still warm, but empty and the door is cracked open. The last time this occurred she was in the pool; I can only be so lucky this time around. I pull a pair of sweatpants and t-shirt on quickly and walk quietly out of the room, hoping to find her in Chase's nursery rocking him as she sings to him softly. But the door to the nursery is closed as white noise plays lightly behind the door.

I hear a muffled 'shhh' followed by Jade's soft giggle behind the other guest room door; I feel a silent rage build inside me and with a shaking hand I grip the doorknob and throw the door open seeing Jade's naked body tangled with Grey's. As soon the door hits the wall Jade pushes Grey off quickly and sits up.

"Billie, I can explain!"

I feel my body jerk awake in a panic, my heart feels like it's going to pound out of my chest, I swallow hard and suppress the tic attack I know I'm about to have, but fail and my head jerks mercilessly to the left several times, causing Jade who's been pressed against me to stir.

"Baby..." I hear Jade's sleepy, yet soft, muffled voice, against my shoulder as she presses her naked, warm body impossibly close to mine, "are you ok?"

"Just a bad dream, love. I'm okay." I sigh turning my head away from her a bit trying to calm down.

"You sure?" She asks picking her head up off my shoulder propping it up in the palm of her hand as she lightly traces small patterns on my stomach.

"Yeah." I say turning my body completely away from her.

"Ok..." I can hear the hurt in her soft voice, but it's not her I'm mad at, I'm pissed off at myself for letting a dream change my feelings about her, even for a minute. "Good night..." I feel her shift lightly and the usual warmth that radiates off her is nowhere near me leaving me feeling cold and a million miles away from her.

I feel Jade push herself off the bed gently trying not to wake me, but I've been awake off and on for hours. And in the early morning hours, I can only make out the silhouette of her curvy body as she paws through the dresser and pulls on pair a of shorts, a bra and a tank top.

"Where you going?" I mumble into my arm.

"To check on Chase." She whispers as she walks back over to the bed, leans over me and kisses my cheek then places a feather light kiss on my lips, while gently combing her fingers through my hair, like she's trying to apologize for my actions last night. "Go back to sleep."

"Ok." I sigh and watch her walk out of the room quietly shutting the door behind her. I feel a twinge of suspicion gnaw at me and check the baby monitor to see if she's actually checking on Chase or gone into Grey's room for round 4 with her.

The door to the nursery opens slowly and Jade appears easing my fears and suspicions, "Good morning baby shark." I hear her greet Chase who's already fussily babbling away. "Are you hungry?" She asks picking him up out of the crib and kissing his cheeks. "Let's get you changed, and we'll get some breakfast." She coos as she lays Chase on the changing table as he babbles and chews on his fingers.

By the time I'm fully awake, again the door to the bedroom is cracked and the blinds are open letting the sun illuminate the room; the house is a little too quiet for my liking, with a groan I sit up slowly covering myself with the sheet to see clothes laid on the bed for and can't help but smile knowing Jade set them out for me.

I lazily pull the clothes on and grab my phone to check the time 10:25am. I sigh to myself, and walk out of bedroom hoping to hear something, like Chase babbling or Jade talking to him or some sort of noise. But nothing, and my rage starts bubble up again.