Their Diary's Pages ([Completed]Under Major Editing)

9.6

Warning: Errors ahead. Read for your own risk.

Gangnam-gu, Seoul
EXO's Dorm

Xiumin's Pov.

This is insane. I'm really insane. Dahil ba ito sa pagod o dahil sa nangyari na naman ngayon? Kahapon lang kami nagkikita pero ito ako ngayon, naiinis na parang ewan. I can't deny the fact that I missed her. I missed her so badly that I wanted to run to her and Hug her tight to get this feelings away.

Kung wala lang sanang nangyari ngayon malamang nandito siya para ipagluto kami. But it's just that the luck was not on us. We decided to not let her go here this time. Alam namin kasi na malalaman niya ang nangyari kahit hindi namin yun sabihin sa kanya. And we don't want her to worried. Seeing her worried is a big question already.

As far as I remember wala naman kaming ibang ginawa ngayon. Wala talaga. We did our best to the fullest. Ewan ko ba kung bakit lagi nalang nila itong ginagawa sa amin. I feel so sorry for Kris and Luhan who got blamed kahit wala naman silang ginawang mali. That manager put his anger to those two. And the worst part is we can do nothing for the both of them.

Siguro iniisip ng mga tao na nasa ayos lang lagi kami. We smile, we laugh but we also cry. We have the attentions that everyone was jealous of but we have the discriminations and humiliations too. And we're too good to hide it.

Kung sakaling nandun siya kanina ng sigawan at murahin si Kris at Luhan siguradong magwawala na naman siya. I felt sorry for her. We lied to her earlier. We are not really ok right now. Diba dapat masaya kami dahil malapit ng irelease ang album namin? Diba dapat hindi na sila nagrereklamo dahil naabot naman namin ang pinakatuktok ng Music Industry sa dalawang taon? But that doesn't seem enough for them. They were trying to push us forward without giving us a few breaks.

I need her right now. I really need her to take this pain away for a little bit. But I'm afraid to make her worried. I'm afraid to see her smiles fade away and changed into a painful one. I'm afraid to see her cry too. And that reason itself tells me I'm falling for it. I'm falling for her. And I love her. D*mn. I'm a fool if I won't admit that.

"Hyung..."

Napalingon ako kay Luhan bago nagpakawala ng malalim na paghinga. The van was full of sighs. Luhan tapped my shoulder and smiled on me. But his smiles was way too painful for me to smile back. He was trying to be ok para sa aming lahat pero hindi niya kayang pigilang ipakita ang sakit sa kanyang mga maya.

Without a second thought, I reach for his shoulders and hugged him. Napatingin lang sa amin ang ibang members. Chen wiped his back to comfort him.

"Sorry kung wala man lang akong nagawa kanina. Hindi tama yun na isisi niya sa inyong dalawa ang galit."

I apologize on him. He take a deep breath before hugging me back and tapped my shoulders. Napatahimik lang ang iba na tiningnan kami. Kris was just sitting there trying to look cool but his face shows that he is frustrating.

Ilang minuto na ba kami dito sa loob ng van. Kanina pa kami nasa labas ng dorm pero parang walang may balak na lumabas. The house seems so empty since she was not here at mukhang yun din ang nararamdaman nila dahilan na hindi muna kami pumasok.

"Don't worry hyung. It will be fine like we always used to be. Thank you sa pag-alala. Mabuti na yung wala kayong ginawa kanina dahil mas maiinis ako kung nadamay pati kayo."