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31st August 2015

***

"Whoa, who...start that again!" I rolled my eyes as Nora looked back at me with wide eyes, the fact that I'd had a few days to process everything that had happened was made blatantly obvious by her reaction.

"I've already told you twice, I'm not repeating everything again."

She pouted before shrugging and stuffing another forkful of noodles into her mouth, chewing quickly and then swallowing before she opened her mouth to reply.

I'd had offered to cook, but upon close inspection of the cupboards we both realised that Chinese food sounded better than tinned sweetcorn, a small variety of flavoured soups and spaghetti hoops. Although spaghetti hoops on toast sounded pretty damn good right now, we were just missing the toast part.

"So...you guys had a huge blowout argument, then you make up, then he tells you he loves you?!" She stated, rerunning through everything I'd told her in the past few minutes and waving her fork around as she did so. "And you didn't ring me so I could beat his ass?"

"I knew you had a lot on, plus with the time difference and..." The excuses I was listing was pointless, I knew I should've phoned her the second things began turning south; but I was too caught up in my own head to even consider that. "He doesn't know that I heard him say he loves me...he thought I was asleep."

"Which you weren't."

"No. I was very much awake."

"Okay...so what're you gonna do?"

I raised an eyebrow as Nora continued to eat while looking back at me for my answer. "If I knew that I'd have done it! Now he's four thousand miles away and I've never missed him more!"

"Shit man...are you gonna eat that?"

I looked down at my still full container of takeout and shook my head, holding out the food for her to take. "M' not feeling great."

She shrugged, drenching my own food in the sauce she'd ordered and tucking into it, the sight of the food in itself was enough to turn my stomach.

"Well, are you gonna say it back?"

"He hasn't even said it to me!" I exclaimed, throwing my head back against the sofa in a dramatic manner. "Not consciously anyway."

I groaned as I stared up at the ceiling, it felt good to be able to spill everything I'd had cooped up inside for the past week in one go. Sure, I could've easily called her and told her what was going on, but it wasn't quite the same.

"We aren't even together." I groaned, throwing my hand over my face as if it would magically make everything go away.

"Oh come on." I opened my eyes again and looked at Nora, her expression silently asking me 'are you stupid?', "that man looks at you like you're the reason the damn earth spins. You guys are together, even if he hasn't 'officially' asked you."

I looked around the walls of Harry's living room, the mantelpiece that was once decorated with a candle and a piece of artwork worth more than I dared to think about was now covered in framed photos of the three of us. The abstract pieces of art that once hung on one of the walls had been replaced by a canvas photograph of us taken at Isabella's birthday.

Nora was right; you only had to look around the room to see how much he loved us both.

Maybe deep down I was scared. Still scarred from the past and instilled with the fear that as soon as we put a label on things, everything would turn to ash around me.

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