diary

20/5

my birthday is tomorrow

and im laying on the couch

reading a book

and it says something that i get

'i love you, but i can not be with you, because i think i still love them'

it sucks being in a relationship with someone

when you have feelings for another person

my grandma, every time i see her

asks me if i have a boyfriend or girlfriend yet

and i always say no

so last time she asked me why i have not been in a relationship for a long time

i told her because i like someone

she said do they like you back

i nodded

she asked what the problem was

i said because i also like someone else

and she smiled

and told me that she wished the world

had more people like me

because some who cheat are with someone while they like another person as well

but i could never do that

i like 2 people

so i am not trying to be with either of them right now

but i still like them

and both of them are possibly going to read this

but that is okay

because for one i am in it for the long game

the other i dont really know where she is going to be in my life

i like her but i do mot think she likes me

i know she did

but i feel as though she does not any more

and i am okay with that

because platonically i like her

and in a not so platonic way i like her

i do not know which way i like her more

but i bought her a purple thingy that is on my head

it is not a hat

i just like putting random things on my head

this was a very scattered entry so

to help ease any confusion

though it is not helping anything

have a random picture i pick from my phone (:

~i'd walk through fire for you,
just let me adore you~
-H